Laura Sterling is our makeover candidate this month. She runs Laura’s Little Critter Barn, which is a not-for-profit haven for wild and domestic animals. Walking into Laura’s house means you’ll encounter a variety of contented creatures. You are first greeted by a canine crew of varying ages and temperaments. In the corner of the dining room is a floor-to-ceiling cage housing two baby squirrels. By the kitchen is a nest of kittens and their momma, who was found in the middle of a busy highway with her head stuck in a can. Laura stopped the car and ran into traffic to save her life. In gratitude, the kitty promptly presented Laura with two kittens. In the living room, under the window, is a crate containing two baby piglets. In the powder room, just off the living room, are two tiny, spotted, baby deer who are still being bottle fed.

To say that Laura Sterling is a unique woman is a bit of an understatement. Laura is both sweetly gentle and hotly fierce. She has carved out a life that makes her the kindest darling to some and the steely-eyed foe to others. She once went to a political meeting, one filled with solemn gravitas, with a tiny baby opossum hunkered down in her pocket. The little baby was on the brink of life and needed to be kept warm and safe. To Laura, who was there to dispense some of her fiery intelligence, the tiny life was equally important as the room full of dignified politicians. How many women do you know who would head to city hall with a pocket full of ‘possum?

Oxymoron
Dear Susan: Last weekend, I had sex with a woman who’s just a friend. (She and I laughed and said it was “friends with benefits.”) But now she’s calling me regularly, asking when I’m coming to see her again. I feel so guilty. It was purely platonic on my part. She’s a nice girl, but honestly, it meant nothing. What should I do?

Dear Reader: It might have meant nothing to you, but it could have unlocked some hopes in her. (Deep sigh.) That’s the tricky part of this misnomer—it’s supposedly casual but rarely so. The hurtful part of the rutting we’ve come to label “casual” is that one of the partners usually brings into the bed a secret hope. They don’t dare express it, fearing their lover will fly the coop. They play the game, pretending the passion is shared, but what lies beneath is a yearning for the real thing. And if you suspect the pretender is usually female, you are correct. And so, the path of casual sex is littered with feminine yearning. The female is the one who proves that “casual sex” is an oxymoron. How can the joining of pulsing flesh be ho-hum casual? Think about it. Then call her and apologize.

“Adventure Awaits, but only for those who seek it!
Too bad, you sofa sitters. Maybe next time!”
– The Uphill Skater –

Back in the day, my husband and I used to sail out of the South Carolina Yacht Club, and we loved that life so much. We really felt like adventurers. We sailed all over the Bahamas, the coast from Savannah to the Florida Keys, and even to the Abacos Islands. We also raced and mentored young people who wanted to learn to sail. What a fabulous time we had. 

Fast forward a few years, and here we are living in West Virginia, now old people, tending our little grandson and sitting around the house all day knitting and eating fatty foods. No, wait a minute. That’s not what we are doing at all. We are still looking for that fun adventure to keep our lives happening in positive ways. Maybe we are not sky diving or going into space, but we are having a really great and busy life.

America can only claim a few art forms as its own. Jazz, for sure. Comic Books, certainly. And, it’s probably safe to add the Western to that list, too.

Westerns are a vital genre, with a habit of reinventing itself every few years, that doubles as a way to talk about American history. While there are certain themes and elements that define the genre, the Western is also proven to be flexible, capable of playing host to many different story lines and a vast variety of characters.

When it comes to back pain, words such as non-functioning, desperation, unbearable and horrifying are heard by back experts every day. Fact is, back pain can be some of the most severe pain a human may ever encounter. The good news—and there is good news—is much of it resolves in time by the body’s natural healing combined with the help of professionals like surgeons, physical therapists, acupuncturists, exercise physiologists and massage therapists. When it comes to back pain, all modalities are welcome if it leads to relief. If you, or a loved one, has experienced back pain, then you are well aware of the toll it takes on overall well-being and function. Bottom-line: Our backs are truly the back bone of our health. That’s why we asked local experts to radiate their knowledge to help us have healthier backs.

In a celebration of motherhood, our renewed makeover feature turned its attention to an ultimate mother.

When Pink Publisher, Elizabeth Skenes Millen, asked her Facebook friends who needed a makeover, there was one particular voice that replied “Yes!” from her mother’s Facebook page. Shortly after, her mother chimed in and replied “She really does!”

Our attention was arrested by this mother, Karin, who wanted something pretty and special for her daughter, April. It was a generous and sweet thing. It was something a mother would do because when we look at the concept of motherhood, we’re really looking at unconditional love in action.

So our hearts had no choice. We chose them both for the makeover.

A New Language
You don’t have to be single to be shy, but it’s more likely when your way of life pushes you to meet new people and make entrances ... solo. That’s why it’s so important to learn the language of SMALL TALK. (It merits capitals because it’s not so easy to learn.) Truth is it’s a totally new language for those of us who never inherited the gift of easy, flowing, not-very-important chatter. Which brings me back to a cringeworthy moment years ago at the United Nations in New York City when I was introduced to an old-time film legend and left alone with him. (If you must know, it was Douglas Fairbanks Jr.) I can still see the expression on my face—and his—as the two of us agonizingly croaked out sounds we hoped passed for conversation. Disaster!

“Yes, I do love the concept of a #Mamabear,
but let’s take it a bit further!”
– The Uphill Skater –

A mama bear is a caregiver. A mama bear nurtures and protects. A mama bear shares love in a unique way. Love is a shared event. I believe the whole concept of a giving and caring persona will encourage others to come together in ways that are not only loving, but also supportive. That kind of person leads by example, and is a role-model. 

Concepts such as “come together”, “come closer” and “come into my warmth” are of such value that we should seek out those who share that value. We all know someone who makes us feel safe, which help us also feel confident and powerful. Being accepted and loved is vital, especially today when so many people feel adrift and lonely. That feeling of being what I call “uninvited” is devastating and creates doubt and fear. Knowing you are loved and valued for who you are not only nurtures, but also is the foundation for a positive self-worth.

CODA
Winner of the 2022 Academy Award Best Picture
Director: Sian Heder | Cast: Emilia Jones, Marlee Matlin, Troy Kotsur

The setting is the fishing village of Gloucester, Massachusetts. As a Child of Deaf Adults and the only hearing person in her family, high school senior Ruby Rossi always has a lot on her plate. Indeed, trying to juggle back-breaking work on her father’s fishing boat, schoolwork, social life and the family’s expectations can be too much for a teenager. But do her parents know Ruby loves to sing? When Ruby signs up for the school choir, singing becomes a passion, and suddenly, the talented young girl finds herself at a crossroads: Should she spread her wings and follow her dreams, or should she keep fighting everyday battles as a member of the proud Rossi family.

During Mental Health Awareness Month this May,
It’s Never Been More Important to
Raise Awareness about Mental Health …
and the Importance of Seeking Help

Family Mental Health Check-In:

By Dr. Stephanie Jamison-Void, PhD
CEO, Jamison Consultants Integrated HealthCare Services

For more than 70 years, the month of May has been designated as Mental Health Awareness Month, helping to raise awareness of mental illness, mental health and behavioral health issues. This year, as the world still deals with the impact of the Covid-19 pandemic on both physical and mental health, the observance of Mental Health Awareness Month is particularly relevant, and increasingly important. Fact is, mental health experts have noted that the pandemic has led to a significant increase in people suffering with both anxiety and depression, as well as exacerbating existing mental health conditions in many individuals.

Exercises in Singleness
DEAR SUSAN: How on Earth did you come up with the idea of exercises in singleness? I’ve heard of situps and pushups for the underused abs and belly muscles, but how does someone exercise their singleness?!

DEAR BLOGGER: The same logic that applies to one’s abs or stomach muscles applies to their singleness: Underused is underdeveloped. A flaccid stomach muscle or abdomen is of little use to its owner when physical strength is called for. (Follow me closely here, dear Readers, and logic will lead you to your answer). The unmarried state, if not utilized vigorously, will tend to either grow inward, narrowing the supply of people so necessary for a full and vigorous life, or make a splash outward and become a mini-world of time-wasters and distractions. Either direction of energy is a contortion of the purpose of life, which is to grow and develop into more of a person. That purpose is best achieved in the unmarried state, when time and resources are under personal control. Exercising one’s singleness is, then, conscious usage of one’s time and resources in order to grow, to explore one’s interests and to expand one’s personal universe. And, when making the decision to migrate to the coupled world, the move can be as smooth as walking off a moving escalator—without missing a step. Paramount to coupled success is the continuation of the Exercises in Singleness! Maintaining them faithfully will keep one’s “undependence” intact and operable. And, not incidentally, it will make you—and your relationship—so much more interesting. Being interesting and beloved makes for a fascinating partnership. I wish it to you.

Is the following statement true or false?
It is often the case that children like what is not good for them
and do not like what is good for them.
True, right? Right!
The question then becomes, are you trying to be liked by your child?

Other forms of the same question are…Does it bother you when your child acts like he doesn’t like you? When your child acts like he doesn’t care for you, do you try to correct the situation? Do you desire, in your heart of hearts, to be seen by your child as a friend?

If you answered “yes” to those questions, then you have proven beyond a shadow of a doubt that you are not of sound mind. In this case, a sound mind is defined as not caring one way or the other whether your child likes you at any given moment in time, or not.

“Natural Style and Grace are actually pretty easy to spot.”
– The Uphill Skater –

I love to be around women who are natural. To me that means those who have their own kind of style and a grace that comes from inner confidence. Women like that make great friends and are always there for you. I am sure you know what I mean. Think about your closest friend or relative. Hopefully, she is the one who makes you feel good about yourself. The one who has confidence in themselves, but also helps you feel confident, too. 

Being true to who you really are can be dependent on the choices you make, which happens nearly 400 hundred times per day. Each time you decide to do one thing and not the other, you make a personal choice. Do you do what you think you should do in the eyes of others, or do you decide what is best for you? Where does your inner strength come from? Do you make that choice from a place of confident strength, or do you just go with the flow? What do you need to do to find the grace to be yourself in the best possible way?

As the world looks on in horror as Russia invades Ukraine, President Vladimir Putin began his campaign against Ukraine’s legitimacy as a nation years ago. He has argued that Ukraine was an integral part of Russian civilization and blamed the country’s ruling class for convincing the world that Ukrainians were different from Russians. But this denial of Ukraine’s existence has a long history in Russian culture and politics dating back to the 1870’s.

Ukrainian filmmakers have been on the forefront of this struggle for cultural recognition, first during Soviet times when Ukraine was a constituent republic and more recently, since Russia’s annexation of Crimea. After 2014, a new generation of Ukrainian cinema matured under the threat of Russian aggression, but also amid the hope for national renewal. The Reel Corner has listed a few Ukrainian films that can easily be accessed on Amazon Prime, Apple TV or Netflix. Each of them show the spirit and struggles of the Ukrainian people.

After so much time spent inside during the cold winter months, we are all ready to get out and enjoy the gorgeous spring weather. However, it’s important to take precautions before basking in the sun. Yes! You can get sunburned even on these beautiful, cool, sunny spring days. Skin cancer—the abnormal growth of skin cells—most often develops on skin that has been exposed to the sun. Are you at risk?

There are three major types of skin cancer:
• Basal Cell Carcinoma: This is skin cancer that begins in the basal cells, which are a type of cell within the skin that produces new skin cells as old ones die off. Basal cell carcinoma typically appears in sun-exposed areas, such as the head and neck and has a slightly transparent bump. It is usually a growth or sore that won’t heal.

I met up with Craig Reaves and his son Sam at the family business, Sea Eagle Market, on Boundary Street in Beaufort. As I was leaving, my husband said, “Pick up some shrimp for dinner!” Everyone in Beaufort loves the Reaves’ fresh shrimp, and a quick and delicious meal can be made with any of their local, fresh seafood.

Craig had started his long day of oystering with a Bible study at 6:30 a.m. He and his family are active at Cross Community Church, a young, active church that meets at the YMCA in Beaufort. Faith and trust in God are an important part of the Reaves family life.

DEAR SUSAN:
Those supposed “bad boys” are filling some need in girls’ lives that makes them take notice—and feel special. Maybe it’s only the cheap rush of danger; maybe it’s sexual, but without a doubt, something strong gets their attention! (And nice guys rarely come on as strong!) Males who see themselves as “nice guys” should give up trying so hard to BE nice—and DO more. An interested person is an interesting person! Be the guy who’s doing things in the world, who’s truly interested in his work, who makes things happen. And guess what—he’s nice, too. Females are drawn to a man who’s interesting. And when niceness is also part of his persona, they’ll fall at his feet. —From the ‘Single File’ Blog

Q: I recently tried toilet training my 32-month-old, but after a few days of no success, I decided to stop. A friend tells me to hang in there, but my pediatrician says my son isn’t ready. She suggests I try again in a few months. Your thoughts?

“Nature’s bounty—nutritious and delicious!”
– The Uphill Skater –

People who are on special diets, be it a fad, a personal choice, or for medical reasons, know there are always challenges. Restrictions, no-nos and transforming a diet to reduced convenient processed foods are all uphill climbs. Trying to eat and live according to natural laws and the foods nature provides is obviously the most healthy way to live, but as we know from what has happened with COVID, science often can contradict itself and is also constantly changing with each new discovery. Food science is exactly the same. As we know more and more about our bodies, and especially how our hormones control what we eat and how our bodies function, we are drawn to foods that science tells us are healthy and natural—hence the boom of kale, avocados, and Brussel sprouts and the birth of numerous mass-produced gluten-free and Keto products—even bread.

What makes those stand-out lines from movies so quotable?

How many times have you stood on your porch and screamed, “I’m the king of the world!” (Titanic) Or wandered around in the dark and uttered, “I have a bad feeling about this?” (Starwars)

Some films have countless quotes that are distinct in their own right; others have one single line that defines the entire feature. Whether it is a niche film or a classic, there is always something that will stand out, one way or another.endations:

Keeping our stomachs happy can be a difficult task when large portions, processed foods and eating on-the-go are all lifestyles most people have adopted, especially in the South, where fried foods are preferred. Most of us know when we’ve gone too far with excessive food and drink, waddling to the couch to assume a horizontal position soon after dinner for relief from overeating. But when are stomach issues, which may be caused by more than a stomach-revolting, self-induced food binge, a concern? We had a gut feeling it was time to ask our local experts to tell us more about the importance of gut health and the perils we may experience.

DEAR SUSAN:
I finally ended a long marriage that was filled with lies, cheating and mental and verbal abuse. (It took years for the divorce to become final.) My therapist, children, family and friends all are encouraging me to start dating again and begin a new life with a new man who deserves and respects me. I shudder at the thought. Whenever the topic is even mentioned I begin to shake and sometimes even cry. I’ve been so scarred by my past relationship that the issue of trust is more than a hurdle; it’s like breaking through a brick wall. I’m very happy surrounded by family and friends—and happy to finally be on my own. I know I have many good years ahead (I’m approaching the age of 50), but why must they be with a partner? Must I start dating again to “heal” and make my life “complete”?

My 3-year-old is fearful of trying anything new, including things that other kids his age love to do such as swinging on a swing, sliding down a slide, and splashing in a pool. I feel like I should begin talking to him about what to do in case of a fire in our house and “stranger danger,” but how can I make him aware of how serious these dangers are without scaring him?

“Free advice straight from the heart!
And, who doesn’t love free advice, right?”
– The Uphill Skater –

Nobody really loves free advice, but you have to admit that most often it comes straight from the heart. I have some excellent free advice for you today, and it is truly straight from my heart because I believe it will make a difference. I have been reading about and researching the New Year, and did you know more resolutions are made in February than in January.

I am not implying that those of us who failed in January are taking yet another shot at it, I’m just saying … okay, I guess that is what I am implying. But good for you—and me— for not giving up! Better late than never, so here is my February Cupid’s arrow loaded with simple free advice and shot directly to the heart. These nuggets of tender loving concern are baby steps toward living your best life.

In honor of the month of Love, Valentine’s Day, and Heart-filled experiences, I surveyed my friends at CVS on Matthews Drive in Hilton Head, along with a few others to nominate their favorite feel-good films.

In the chaos we live in today, a film that makes you smile, feel good and look at life with optimism is exactly what we need.

What is your favorite? Here are a few surveyed recommendations: