“An adventure doesn’t have
to involve fear, but mine sure did!”
— The Uphill Skater —

My husband, Bill, and I have sailed thousands of miles including all around Hilton Head, down the coast as far as Key West, up as far as Annapolis on the Chesapeake Bay, and all around the Bahamas and Exuma Cays. We have sailed across the Mediterranean, and Bill has done the Atlantic crossing. We have sailed around Tahiti, Morea, and Bora Bora. We have even sailed up the coast of Australia.

Dear Susan:
I just re-read your column about “apartners,” and I’m sending along my two cents. Since my marriage ended two years ago, I’ve been lucky enough to share some personally productive relationships. Currently, I’m dating someone with the strength of character to be himself with me, and we’re having a wonderful time. But as much as I like him, I still cannot imagine any other person, however beloved, in my space.

It’s back-to-school time, which means the chance of getting sick is on the rise. No one ever escaped childhood without experiencing the typical illnesses that seem to swarm through schools every year. Illnesses that get everyone’s noses running and a day or two off from school. Of course, lying in bed with fever and chills is not nearly as fun as gym class, but then again, if it means a few more days to study for a chemistry test, it may not seem so bad.

The six most-prevalent illnesses in schools are: Influenza; COVID; Hand-Foot-Mouth Disease; Stomach Flu; Strep Throat; and Pink Eye. And as we all know, these illnesses can easily pass from child to child, child to teacher, and child to parent in the wheeze of a sneeze or one little night, night kiss. No one likes feeling bad or being sick, and that’s why we went to the professionals to learn more about avoiding illness and what to look for now that the children are back in school:

Meet Thelma in this sensational summer surprise that takes on a scam artist with the most unsuspecting of all leading ladies. You will enjoy this fun foray into taking down a villain everyone hates.

Thelma
June Squibb, Fred Hechinger, Parker Posey
Written and Directed Josh Margolin

Thelma, writer/director Josh Margolin’s debut feature, is an unlikely mix of genres and styles. It is a touching comedy-drama about family issues and the challenges of old age—a tribute to Josh’s grandmother loosely based on actual events in her life. 

“I love the power of women working in common.
Girl groups have so much strength to share among
themselves and with others, as well!”
— The Uphill Skater —

I usually write about lifestyle and/or good health, and this month I get to combine both! As we look at our theme this month, Join the Club, I am going to use the term "club" very casually.

All of us girls have at some time been part of a club, small group or clique. Some have been for better, while others for worse, and many of these groups that started out informally have lasted for years. In fact, I know of several friend groups who have been together since grade school. My family moved a lot when I was young, so I do not have old friends, nor do I have a big family. But allow me to share what I do have right now, which works wonders for me.  

DEAR SUSAN: I have a dilemma. My wife died a little over two years ago, ending our wonderful marriage of 26 years and making me a widower at 49. My wife was popular and well-liked by many in our area. Now I feel ready to explore the possibility of dating again by using online dating apps. The problem, though, is that some of my wife's single friends use those apps, too, and I'm afraid of being judged for not mourning long enough. What's a typical time frame for mourning, and is this a legitimate concern? —Worried Widower

Swelling, tenderness, stiffness, and pain are expected when an injury occurs. If you fall and hurt your knee, chances are you will experience all four of these symptoms, as well as some bruising. However, most of us experience some of these symptoms even when we haven’t injured ourselves. We just wake up feeling like we’ve been hit by a Mack truck and literally hobble to the kitchen to inject coffee.

Is this arthritis? Not necessarily! But there’s both good and bad news. If symptoms are fleeting, arthritis is probably not the culprit. You may simply need to stretch, exercise, reduce inflammatory food and beverage intake, or drink more water. However, if the symptoms persist throughout the day, you may have arthritis and need to check in with your physician. We wanted to learn more about arthritis because it’s a disease many people have but very few talk about. It also seems to be an inevitable condition that naturally comes along with aging. Tell us this isn’t so! We had to be sure, so we asked the experts to tell us more.

Summertime at the Movies
Get ready for a whole lot of
action, twists and fun!

The beach, pools, tennis/pickleball courts, and bike paths are bustling with busyness and baking in the summer heat. Meanwhile, the Reel Corner encourages you to look for a cool dark theater, wafting with the smell of popcorn, to escape these hot afternoons.

“The women of this country these days need some icons, and
if they think I am one, then I am very happy about that!”
— Naomi Parker Farley, a.k.a. Rosie the Riveter

“We needed women to look up to then, and we need them now!”
— The Uphill Skater, a.k.a. Judith Lawrenson

There’s barely a more iconic American female than Rosie the Riveter. For more than 80 years, her strong, clenched fist image has appeared literally everywhere from 1940s posters, which peppered government offices and factory break rooms, to modern day T-shirts, mouse pads, coffee mugs, baseball caps, purses and every other imaginable retail item. Rosie the Riveter stood for something then—“We Can Do It”—bolstering the women left behind to takeover many male-dominated jobs while the men were at war.

Yes, I realize there are plenty of ways to judge your lover—the amount of hair on his head, the sexy pout of her lips, the way just being with the person puts you on top of the world. But right here, I'm suggesting a different criterion. It's one that may not be as thrilling, but it comes with a lifetime of durable joy. For a moment, then, consider with me a standard based on self-esteem. Not vanity or puffed ego but a basic friendship with oneself.

Q: I’m a working single mom with a 4-year-old daughter who won’t go to sleep unless I lie down with her. Plus, if she wakes up in the middle of the night to find I’m no longer in her bed, she comes and crawls into bed with me. If I attempt to persuade her to go back to her bed, she starts to cry. To be honest, I just don’t have the strength to fight it. She knows what I want her to do, but she also knows I have yet to enforce it. Can you provide me with a workable plan that will not cause her—and therefore me—anguish?

World Heart Rhythm Week (WHRW) is June 3-9 this year. The week is dedicated to education and awareness of heart rhythm disorders and here’s why it’s important:

Your heartbeat is the most fundamental rhythm in your life, signaling the regular pumping of your heart as it sends blood carrying oxygen and nutrients to the rest of your body. It’s easy to take this regular beating for granted, never giving it a second thought, until the masterful control process goes wrong. The consequences can be devastating! When your heart rhythm is not at a consistent pace, you may have an arrhythmia.

In the early days of the film industry, little thought was given to professional stunt performances. If something risky needed to be done for a scene, the producers would hire anyone crazy or desperate enough to do it. Surprisingly, women were involved as stunt people early in filmmaking. In fact, Hollywood employed roughly the same number of stuntmen as stuntwomen, Until the 1930s, women—many from acting or dancing backgrounds— undertook stunts such as horseback riding, car stunts, hanging from buildings, and diving into freezing water.

But as movies became increasingly popular and more profitable, women became marginalized in the industry, being replaced by men wearing women’s clothing and wigs—a practice still occasionally used, known as “wigging”.

“I hope you have a berry good summer!”
– The Uphill Skater –

Still hanging on to peak season, strawberries are just about the best thing there is, both in nutrition and deliciousness. Available in abundance, I urge you not to pass up the little basket of strawberries at your grocer or favorite farmers’ market.

Wallet a little thin these days? With some creative thinking and a relaxed, open-minded attitude, you can plan a fantastic date without breaking the bank. Think about it this way: Going frugal is a way to make sure you're with someone who values experience over material things!

Take a stroll.
Whether it's in a park, on the beach, or anywhere else, simply walking without a specific destination is a great way to gauge compatibility with your date. Can you engage in conversation? Are your pauses awkward, or do you exchange smiles and comfortable glances?

Q: Our first child, a boy, just turned two. Per your advice, he is toilet trained and eating whatever I serve. Before he was born, we determined that we were not going to raise a picky eater. Our problem isn’t our son; it’s my sister-in-law, who has three kids, the youngest of which is four. She insists that my husband and I say “no” to our son way too much. Is that even possible? Our son is very active and determined to get his own way. Your advice would be greatly valued.

A: First, I congratulate you on getting off to such a good start. These days, it is the rare child who is toilet trained on time (before twenty-four months) and equally rare for a two-year-old to be eating whatever is put in front of him. Those are hardly accidents of genetics or “luck of the draw.” They testify to parents who understand the need to set good disciplinary precedents early in a child’s life.

The beach, golf, tennis, bike rides, long walks, pickle ball, fishing, kayaking, boating, and summer picnics all have two things in common: 1. They are all a ton of fun, and 2. They all expose us to the sweltering summer sun. Like most everything in life, there is both a good and bad side of sunshine. The essential Vitamin D we soak in from the sun’s rays is important for good health and feeling well. However, if we take in too much, especially without protection, those rays of sunshine can decide to play dirty.

The key to enjoying the sunshine, again, like most everything, is moderation. Be smart and proactive when spending the day outdoors. Use a tent or umbrella to relax under when at the beach. Be sure to lather on the sunscreen if you’re going to be on the courts or golf course for hours on end. Wear a hat; there are a lot of cute ones out there! Pay extra attention to your face, nose, the tops of your feet, the tips of your ears, and your shoulders. Buy a quality sunscreen. (See our suggestions.) And get checkups every year.

Angel Studios was originally founded as VidAngel, which had the mission to show any movie to children without worrying about explicit material. VidAngel provided a filtering service that allowed viewers to skip or mute scenes they did not want to watch from streamed movies and television shows, by allowing them to set customized filters on graphic violence, nudity, and profanity. In 2021 VidAngel sold the filtering device and developed a new business model in Angel Studios.

Angel Studios is named after the “angel investors” who participate in the new model that uses equity crowdfunding to finance original productions. These productions are distributed via the Angel Studios streaming platform for free. The company relies on a pay-what-you-want revenue model, coined “Pay It Forward”, in which viewers can optionally pay for the content if they choose to support it.

“Never heard of Cole Brauer?
Well, you’re about to!”
– The Uphill Skater –

I usually write about research I do on new developments in foods or cutting-edge discoveries regarding health and nutrition. However, my research led me down a totally different path this month.

My husband, Bill, and I have been serious sailors for well over 20 years. As such, all things about or related to sailing interest me, but I certainly was not looking to find or write about a female sailor. My curious mind led me to seek information about the health benefits, or lack thereof, of dehydrated foods versus canned, frozen, or fresh. As my research deepened, somehow, I clicked and delved into the world of Cole Brauer, which had nothing to do with nutritional values of dehydrated foods! (Can you believe I got sidetracked on the Internet?)

The Toss of a Coin
Yes, singleness gives the power of being in charge of your life, but what about the sadness we often feel? How do you explain it?

Being in total control of your life is the positive side of single life, but the flip side is there, too—a sad, gnawing realization that you're on your own. Onlyness, I call it. But—you suspected this was coming—don't think being coupled gives you total immunity from those down moments! They are very much part of the human condition, single and married. So when the blues come a-calling, it's your duty to remind yourself that singleness isn't a curse any more than being coupled is a guarantee of 24-hour bliss. Every honest relationship has its problems and its rough patches. But a couple who are best friends will put their heads and hearts together and jointly work things out—because they want to. Keeping an upbeat, realistic attitude toward themselves, each other and what they have together gives a healthy relationship very good odds for long-term survival.

To most folks, micromanagement has to do with tasks or performance. The micromanaging parent, for example, is generally thought of as one who hovers over a child’s homework or academics in general. Indeed, that is the most common form, but parental micromanagement can also extend to organizing and directing a child’s social life and recreation.

Whatever the context, micromanagement is driven by anxiety. The micromanaging parent is anxious that the child might do something that reflects badly on the parent, which means that parental micromanagement is a variation on the theme of codependency. It is almost always the case that the attempt to micromanage a child engenders relationship problems of one sort or another, including rebellion.

CONGRATULATIONS, Pink Magazine 20 years and still going strong!

Below are several films released in 2004. Even 20 years later, these movies remain relevant, compelling, and entertaining. I suggest you revisit all of them, as they can be easily streamed, providing a wonderful night of movies guaranteed to be good.

Million Dollar Baby
Clint Eastwood, Hilary Swank, Morgan Freeman | Directed By: Clint Eastwood

Frankie, an ill-tempered old coach, reluctantly agrees to train aspiring boxer Maggie. Impressed with her determination and talent, he helps her become the best, and the two soon form a close bond.

“Both Elizabeth and Pink have been a part of the fabric
of Lowcountry life for many years and their
staying power is the tribute to that fact!”
– The Uphill Skater –

I have been with Pink one way or another for many years, in fact, almost since the beginning. I started writing a column called "One From The Heart,” and then wrote profiles, and finally "Skating Uphill." I must tell you that I have loved every minute of being a part of the brand Pink has become. I am going to go back quite a bit for one of my favorite memories of Elizabeth Millen, the founder of Pink, and only really old-timers will remember this.

Love is not social work. Yes, I've said it before, but given more space, let's really dig into the concept. All of us have at some point met someone who shakes our universe but comes with a lot of baggage. To be kind, let's call them issues. We brush aside friends' warnings—and our own viscera—to help this deserving person who seems mired in problems but kisses the way we like it. If we can just get through the muck surrounding him/her, we tell ourselves, we'll be home free with a terrific partner. In fact, we may even have found our soul mate!

Q: My three-year-old is prone to ear infections. When he has one, his behavior deteriorates considerably. He becomes disobedient and given to angry outbursts. When his ears are clear, he’s generally delightful to be around. I’m reluctant to discipline him when his ears are hurting him, but I’d like your advice on this.

A: Obviously, your son doesn’t have a behavior problem per se; he has an ear infection problem that adversely affects his behavior. Given that when his ears are clear, he’s a delightful little fellow, I’d be reluctant to recommend any form of punitive discipline.