Suddenly Single

When you are in the throws of divorce it sometimes seems there will never be an end to the mind numbing pain and emptiness your heart feels. For me the hardest thing to come to terms with was that no one else loved me. I was disposable, cast aside. Sure I had my children, but I didn't have a special someone to care for me. My heart had been so full when I got engaged. I remember flying home from Paris, after a whirlwind weekend of everything French from top of the Eiffel Tower to the finest Montrachet and a great big fat Emerald ring. On the plane I looked down at my left hand and felt overwhelmed that some one loved me, and I belonged to someone else now, too. There was someone to put a present I didn't know about under the tree, or someone to surprise me with flowers and a card for Valentines Day. But then when you get hit with an arrow launched from cupid's evil twin, it's hard to remain Rosie, and the last thing you want to see rolling around is another Hallmark holiday when your previously full heart is now an empty vault. But as older and wiser divorcees understand, it gets better and better as long as you let it.

And that's where friends come in. How about this for nice? The newest member of the Darling Divorcees was dreading Valentine's Day, and almost begged out of a lovely girlie dinner planned at Spice restaurant. The three of them were alone for different reasons, not just due to divorce. So darling divorcee "M" stepped into her red Prada shoes and with her son's encouragement got her heart on. When the Valentinettes arrived, they were greeted with "special made for them" cocktails, a delicious dinner and a chocolate dessert that cupid must have made himself and sent down from cloud nine. You would have thought the curtain call would be the long-stemmed red roses delivered for each of the not so lonely hearts. But no. The encore was a hand delivered note from their children listing all the things they loved about Mum. Now what I absolutely love about this story is that all of the above (including the hefty check) was taken care of by a MAN.YES, a MAN! One of the Valentine trio's business trip bound hubbys organized it all. My cold anti-Valentine's Day heart started to melt when I heard this.

And that is not the only nice Valentine story I have.  How about this?  I am in the kitchen baking a red velvet cake, which I hate to admit, turned out to be more of a red leather cake thanks to me not using buttermilk. Just a little important background information, Luke, my son, is the only guy in the house. At the moment our house is chocked-full of estrogen (well, what's left of it for some of us). He is stuck with me, Sophie, my Mum, Nana (bless her) and my friend, Cindy.

On the fabulous fourteenth, Luke waltzed through the door with not one, not two, but five bouquets of roses for all his crazy little Valentines. I was floored and proud. My son!  Well, he admitted "I learned from last Mother's Day, Mum when you said all you wanted was for me to clean my room." And, silly him, that was all he did. Needless to say, there was a frosty chill in the hot humid May air until he figured out that when a woman (Mum) says "all she wants" is actually an order for the minimum expected, and you better put your thinking cap on. "Nothing" means "something". My gallant nineteen-year - old told me how nice it was to see the surprise on all of our faces.  And in his infinite wisdom announced, "Women like the little things, especially when they are unexpected." My heart is turning into marshmallow now.

Which brings me to Mr. Crown and Ginger. He needs to have a chat with Luke. He didn't get the "Don't bother" means "bother" vibe. I am sure my deep-seated anti-Valentine venom is a self-preservation from disappointment barrier. It's not that I didn't appreciate the mouse pad, but it wasn't even RED. And we both learned something. Mr. C&G learned that in the future, even though I pretend Valentine's Day doesn't really count, it does. He also learned the phone number for A Floral Affair here on the island and is now signed up for Tiffany & Co. e-mails. I learned that even a cold professional divorcee like myself can be warmed and swayed by cupid's arrow, a dozen red roses, and a lovely gesture.oh, and a mouse pad?

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