Every June, in honor of Father’s Day, we run a feature called Men and Their Chairs, and every year I am inspired. We pick a handful of local men, ask them somewhat touchy-feely questions and always get back answers that fill our hearts and remind us that men rock!

We are living in an era of male-bashing. There are many disgruntled women out there who think all men are alike. Most sitcoms portray the male of the family as clueless or absent. And, many women insist on controlling everything and everyone these days almost to the point of emasculation epidemic proportions. Women have proven that we can do almost everything men can—have equal intelligence, excel in sports, fly to the moon, hold rank in the military and lead huge corporations with the best of them.

I have always been dependable, so much so, I won Most Dependable in the 7th grade, and every year after. I was taught that if you say you’re going to do something, you need to follow through. I never took commitment lightly. If I agreed to wear a dress to school (remember how we called our friends and we would all agree to wear dresseson the same day?), then by golly I had a dress on. If I held an office in a club, I did my duty to the fullest extent. In other words, my reputation was stellar in that people could count on me just like the sun coming up.

However, as dependable and trustworthy as I was (and still am) for others, there was one person I let down over and over again…me. I was talking to my life coach many years ago and she just came right out and said it: “Elizabeth, you have lost your reputation with yourself.”

“To a child’s ear, ‘mother’
is magic in any language..”
— Arlene Benedict —

My mom is 90 and has been living with me since February. It’s been good for both of us. Even at 90, my mother seems to be magic at times. This magic has lasted my entire life. It wasn’t a figment of my childhood adoration; her magic is always present. If anything, my adoration for my mother is stronger now than when I was a youth because I know what she’s been through. I now understand where she came from and some of the obstacles she has hurdled and defeated. I have had the great pleasure of having deep meaningful talks with my mom, and she’s told me some deep, dark secrets. My childhood adoration of her has rooted in profound respect. If anything, her magic is at an all-time high.

In Judith Lawrenson’s Skating Uphill column on page 42, she mentions there are three times of the year she hates: New Year’s, her birthday and spring, all because she gets the uncontrollable urge to purge, spring clean and organize. Not to throw Judith, who is a good friend of mine, under the bus, but Judith, let’s put this into perspective: None of those times of the year require a bathing suit.

I admit I have a love-hate relationship with bathing suit season. I love it because I adore the water! I can stay in the pool or ocean all day long. I enjoy swimming, boating, going to the beach, going to the pool—all of it. The downside is the attire—the dreaded swimsuit.

“We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.”
— George Bernard Shaw —

I’m beyond ready to lift the weight of the world off my shoulders! I’m sure you are, too. Life as a parent, daughter, business owner, bill-payer and generally responsible adult is hard, and last year made it worse. As such, the little bit of playfulness I had left that adulting had not extinguished, burned out quickly. 

Many experts agree that playing is not a luxury, but a necessity. But of course, they are referring to children. Didn’t George Bernard Shaw say youth is wasted on the young? Despite not having done any research, nor having any credentials in psychology, I’m going to declare that play is a necessity for adults, too.