At only 14 years old, Pamela-Joy O’Grady knew exactly what she wanted her life to be. She made a conscious decision to marry a tall man who was rich enough to give her a lifestyle she wanted to become accustomed to. Her goals were to travel extensively, have lots of kids and serve God.

Pamela-Joy was born in England and lived in London. At 19, she landed a job in France and worked there for a few years. “Then at 21 years of age,” she said, “I made my list. You know, a wish list, everything I wanted in a husband. He had to be tall, handsome, he had to have attended the same type of school as I went to, and he had to have brothers and sisters, because if he was an only child, I felt he would be spoiled.” She quit her job and returned to England to find him.

This month, our theme is #MamaBear. You are currently on a tough journey trying to become a mama bear, as you wrap up your first In Vitro Fertilization (IVF) treatment. Why have you decided to share your IVF journey?
Infertility affects so many people. One in eight couples experience infertility, which means someone in your life has struggled, and you may or may not be aware. By speaking out, I hope I can make a difference with infertility awareness, somehow, some way. Whether the difference is in helping someone not feel alone during their own infertility struggles, or just putting information out that can help people understand infertility a bit more. Either way, in my heart it feels right, and I actually feel lighter in speaking my truth and sharing this very personal experience.

Sassy, determined, humorous, and one hell of a woman, Ms. Tawanda Jackson is nothing short of fabulous. With just about everyone who encounters her, she is “Mama.” Known as Ms. TJ, Mama TJ and just plain Mama, she lives up to her loving nicknames, going above and beyond to make sure she takes care of just about everyone and everything she can. With a true mama bear spirit, Ms.TJ is serving up love, support and advice to anyone who needs it.

Hailing from Fuquay-Varina, NC, in 1975, TJ followed her then boyfriend to Beaufort, SC, where he was stationed as a Marine. By 1977, she was on to bigger and better things and relocated herself to Hilton Head Island, where she found her lifelong happy place. Her first job on the Island was helping to open a Huddle House, which was the first 24-hour restaurant ever on Hilton Head. Working her way up from dishwasher to manager, Mama TJ gave Huddle House 28 years of hard work, dedication, laughs and love.

How long have you been in showbiz, and how did you get into it?
Well, if you count tip-toeing across the stage as a “snowflake” in the Nutcracker ballet at the age of 3, it’s been quite a long time! I’ve been a loud-and-proud extrovert for as long as I can remember, so naturally my parents quickly realized that performing was a good outlet for me to put all that energy into as a kid. I’d say my official induction into “showbiz” was when I was in 5th grade. I auditioned for one of the professional productions at the Arts Center of Coastal Carolina (Arts Center) and was lucky enough to get the part. After that, I continued to audition for their shows all through middle and high school, and by the time I graduated, I had been in six equity productions at the Arts Center. Now at 23, I’m still pursuing theatre on a professional level, and I’m back at the theater that started it all, which is a cool full-circle moment.

The team names for these bowling divas are hilarious! There’s Split Happens, Lucky Strikes, Too Legit to Split, Mother Gutters, Splits & Giggles, Incredibowls, Living on a Spare, Balls to the Wall, Pin Up Girls, Spare Me, Pin Pals and Wicked Ballers. They have special dress-up nights such as ugly Christmas sweaters, Halloween costumes, and recently, they had a “Galentine” celebration (Girls Valentine Party)! Most of all, these ladies are having a blast!
Denise Philippi is the instigator, er…organizer of this wacky group of around 60 women who descend on the usually normal Station 300 Bowling Alley off Buckwalter Parkway in Bluffton every Tuesday from 6:30-9:30.

Bored with the quarantine, Denise wanted a way to meet people and make new friends. Last fall, she posted an open invite on Facebook and got a huge, immediate response from other ladies in the same boat! She created a Facebook page, set up the night with Station 300 to reserve lanes for the ladies, and the fun began!

Seriously, Matt! An open, bucket-list invitation to play a round of golf stands when (and if) you are ready. Mary Shanahan knows how to have fun, she’s a terrific golfer, and golfing with you is one of the few things she has on her bucket list. She works at the RBC Heritage and is the Vice-Chair of the front-9 marshals; and last year, Mary handed Matt a Coke. Also on her bucket list is to travel to Scotland and throw a caber. “You know, the telephone poles that are thrown by big guys in kilts,” she laughed. The only other things on her bucket list are to travel more and go on a ghost tour at a cemetery.

Mary began golfing at age 9 and continues today. Since she moved to Hilton Head in 2013 she has won the Club Championship at Hilton Head Country Club for seven of the past eight years. In 2015 she had rotator cuff surgery, so she couldn’t play, otherwise she may have clinched eight of eight. “Golf is a game that can’t be won, you can only play,” Mary said. “I play with great people of all skill sets and levels, and I still take lessons every year because something always goes wrong.”

“When I was 10 years old, I knew I had found what I loved to do,” explained Isabel Grace Thurlow.

Isabel is a 17-year-old, gentle souled, incredibly passionate, rocket blast of a young woman with more gumption than you can shake a stick at. She grew up being on the water constantly, always wanting to be like her big brother, James, and sail. At 10-years-old, she came to the conclusion it was her time to start sailing, as well. And being homeschooled most of her school life, the opportunities became endless for her to start conquering her urges to be on a sailboat.

What was your very first adventure?
Growing up in Northwest Wisconsin we were outside all the time. A trip we often took as a family was a canoe trip up in the Boundary Water Canoe Area (BWCA) in Ontario, Canada. We would first find our way to our cabin, which could only be accessed by snowmobile, 4-wheeler, or boat. The cabin used a generator for electricity, and of course, the bathroom was an outhouse—not exactly glamping. We would pack the canoe and our hiking packs for a few days and take off. We would canoe and portage from lake to lake and camp overnight—rain or shine!

A lush subtropical jungle extends right to the sea, losing itself in tide and time. Pines, palmettos and live oaks succumb to unrelenting forces—sand, salt, wave action—leaving only their sun-bleached “bones” as a testament to where the forest once was, until at last even those bones are swept away. The endless process of our coast being made, unmade and made anew can be witnessed in real-time on Hunting Island, which has undergone drastic changes over the last few decades. This dynamic evolution is natural to barrier islands, which are constantly being either eroded or built up depending on currents and other factors. But human impact has played a role too. For those of us who love Hunting Island and have seen great chunks of it wash away in violent storms, accepting change to this special place is bittersweet.

To say that Debby Boots is a nature lover is a grave understatement. She is in absolute awe of nature and gives every tree, flower, plant, sea creature, animal, bird and weed her respect and reverence. At 85 years young, Debby is still doing everything she can to educate people about the world around them and the importance of preserving our ecosystems. She is a dedicated advocate of the Coastal Discovery Museum and its programs, especially their children’s programs, and as a nature guide, she provides 2-hour tours of both Mitchellville Beach and Pinckney Island.

A love that took 37 years to culminate, Karen Goulden and Scott Hanselman have tempted fate too many times not to finally be together.

How do you recall your first-time meeting? Karen: We met at the University of Michigan. It was spring 1985. I was 22 and he was 21. I was at his apartment saying goodbye to his roommates as they had just graduated. Scott had just returned from Marine Corps boot camp and this was the first time I saw him. I’ll never forget it. I thought he was gorgeous and hoped I’d see him again. Scott: I know I will be in the doghouse for this, but I honestly don’t remember—it was 37 years ago! We met through mutual friends. 

A silly little mouse is the reason Laura Sterling was up at 4 a.m. The mouse is tiny—it could easily fit in the palm of a 2-year-old’s hand—with velvety gray fur and eyes that still haven’t opened. Someone accidently disrupted its nest in their woodpile, and when the mother never returned, they brought the orphaned baby to Laura. Now it lives inside a dishtowel in a little basket on her kitchen counter.

“We always try to reunite them with their moms,” says Laura, a Fairfax, South Carolina native, whose mother also cared for injured wildlife and stray animals. “We raise them to release them; we’re not trying to make pets out of them.”

Lynnette and David Thompson are a couple married for 23 years who are still sweethearts and Valentines. They sat on their couch after David got home from work and told their sweet story together. They reminded me of teenagers “going steady.” It’s not been a time without struggles and difficulties, but they have made it through together.

The couple met in May,1996, while attending the Fire Academy in Texas in hopes of becoming firefighters. David noticed the pretty 19-year-old immediately, and when he was selected as president of the group, he chose her as his vice president, “mostly to get to know her,” he admitted. He had just gotten out of the USMC, was 23, and looking for a new career.  She didn’t instantly like him. He seemed arrogant and came across as a “know it all,” having spent the last four years as a Marine, and said everything in the training was “too easy” for him. It took him three months, but he convinced her to go out.

“I’ve always had dreams,” said Latia Nelson. “And I never want to be that older woman who says she gave up her dreams and has regrets.” Latia calls herself a one-woman army who marches forward each day to follow her dreams and her heart.

At the age of 21 Latia became a single mom, after being raised by a single mother herself. “Circumstances were a motivation for me. I saw my mother struggle, and at 16, I wanted to get a job to help out. I’m never going back. I’m not going to look back. I’m going to keep going.” As a first-generation college graduate, she earned not one, but two degrees—liberal arts and business administration/marketing. She now has more than 10 years experience in visual media arts and branding.

They met on Monday, married on Saturday and 57 years later, Eileen and Robert Hutton are still married and very much in love.

“We met on a picket line,” Eileen chuckled. She and Bob both had jobs at Montgomery Ward Department Store in Detroit. Bob had just gotten out of the Air Force, and she had just finished her first year of college. Then Retail Clerks International went on strike, and they were among the picketers.

At age 10, Kalimah Elizabeth Moss may not have terms like “aspirational” or “economic empowerment” in her vocabulary, but she’s already living them. Her company, Lizzie’s Lip Pop, LLC, is a glittering success (she even has a customer in Africa!) and her achievements have motived other young people to follow their dreams, too.

“I started my business during quarantine because it was boring and there was nothing to do,” said Kalimah, whose nickname, Lizzie, was bestowed at birth by her grandmother and now lends itself to her company. “I also hate sticky lip gloss from out the store, so I made my own. If kids tell me I can’t do it, I’ll still do it. Ever since I started my business, my brother started his own business and so did my cousin.”

Caroline Oyler is a recent graduate of the University of Virginia and a recent transplant to the Lowcountry. She is originally from Louisville, Kentucky, and moved to Hilton Head last March, just in time for the pandemic, but that hasn’t slowed Caroline down at all.

She has a successful Instagram page called Simply Radishing, where she shares her own experience and research on vegan lifestyles, nutrition, mindfulness and mental health. Caroline also solicits and reviews products from vendors in order to keep her followers updated and informed. She recently added a blog where she shares recipes and advice. Her goal is not to sell ads, or make money, it’s to help others. In addition, Caroline intends to complete a yoga training program so she can teach yoga on a part-time basis. What’s amazing is how she juggles all of this while working full time as a law clerk at Horton & Goodman Law Firm in Bluffton.

he uncomfortableness that would surround me when someone would ask “Why does your dad only have one arm?” or “How many siblings do you have?” was sometimes unbearable. I usually found myself thinking about exotic lies to tell people about these situations because the truth was too complicated for me to comprehend and explain at that age. I remember telling one of my classmates that my dad got his arm bitten off by an alligator because I thought it was easier to say that than to say, “He got in a car wreck and had to get his arm amputated.” It was so confusing when others would ask me how many siblings I had. I didn’t know whether to say I had 3 or 2. Did she still count as my sibling even though she passed away? My young innocent mind couldn’t handle it.
    Excerpt from "Every 16 Minutes"—An Essay by Jaala Grant

When most college freshman are flying from party to party without a thought of the consequences, Jaala Grant doesn’t play that. She’s too familiar with what can happen when life goes horribly wrong.    
“So many teenagers drive crazy, and they just think it’s a joke,” says this quiet, mature Hilton Head native and first-year nursing major. “Until something happens—then it’s too late.”

With a brisk beach walk and talk and brilliant brains colliding, the idea was born. In 2015, the conversation between Karen Kindermann and Amber Kuehn, alongside a bale of volunteers, the foundation of their idea turned into a reality, making Turtle Trackers what they are today. The Turtle Trackers is a 501(c)3 charity made up of volunteers from across Hilton Head Island and Bluffton. Their mission is to assist the Sea Turtle Patrol of Hilton Head Island and educate the public for the protection of our most precious locals, our sea turtle hatchlings heading to the ocean.

Starting with a small but fierce crew, the Turtle Trackers grew from a mere five or six gals  to more than 400 volunteers, men and women, and six chapters island wide. The group originated in Sea Pines but has made its way to Forest Beach, Shipyard, Palmetto Dunes, Singleton Beach, Port Royal and the North End, which is the chapter of trackers anyone can join.

Three lovely ladies met up with me at Beaufort Waterfront Park yesterday, and I must admit, I envy them. They are part of a sisterhood that has been active in Beaufort for 40 years, and have made friendships and connections that reach all over the country and beyond our borders. They are members of the Nu Delta Omega chapter of the Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, Inc. It’s a sorority for black women either in college, or after graduation, and it’s all about service and friendship.

Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, Inc. (AKA) began with a dream in the heart of a young Howard University student, Ethel Hedgeman.  Along with eight other students, in 1908 she started the first black sorority that has grown to nearly 300,000 members world-wide. Through the years the membership has addressed issues such as women's suffrage, segregation and inequality, poverty and poor health care and educational inequity. The organization emphasizes service: whether in Africa, or to people next door, and always strives to lift women up by creating bonds of friendship.

In the summer of 1990 two young college coeds headed to Capitol Hill as student interns.

Rose Newton, a Southern conservative Christian Republican from rural Manning, SC, was to work for Senator Strom Thurmond of South Carolina. Sharon Anolik, a liberal Jewish Democrat from California, was assigned to Senator Barbara Boxer of California.

These US Senators were polar opposites in their political views and ideologies, and quite frankly, so were these two young women. Fate brought them together as roommates that summer, and against all odds, they built a friendship that has lasted three decades and counting.

Kitty Price Wright and Fran Wise met in 1952, when they were in second grade in Salisbury, N.C. Their friendship spans nearly seven decades, 68 years to be exact. They have supported each other through thick and thin, from sharing their school and college years, to raising their children and grandchildren and going through the deaths of their parents.

Last February, Kitty received a diagnosis of breast cancer. She texted Fran to share the bad news, and Fran responded with a text that stated: “I can send the same text back to you. I got my diagnosis yesterday.”

When Stephanie Reed and Brooke Allen met each other 22 years ago as young mothers in a local bible study on Hilton Head Island, they could not have imagined all they would share in the pursuing years. This chance meeting grew into a bond between two people that is rare to come by.

“We grew up together, and our children grew up together. Our friendship is an extension of who I am, and each moment together is just as special as the last. We are more than best friends, Brooke is my family,” Stephanie said.

It was an old-fashioned love affair of Hampton County. She was in the 9th grade, and he was a senior, so a month went by before Willard and Lynda Tuten told anyone they’d married. “Momma and daddy hit the ceiling,” Lynda recalls. “But anyway.” By age 20 she had four children and a lifetime ahead with her beloved Willard.

“We did everything together,” said Lynda, who lives on Paukie Island in Beaufort. “He wasn’t one of these who had to go out with the boys. Our hobbies were going to yard sales and festival hopping. I don’t think I’ve missed but one Hampton Watermelon Festival, and that was when my granddaughter got married.”

When Rhonda Wallace enrolled in medical school seven years ago, she joined the ranks of some 20,000 students aspiring to become doctors. At the time, men outnumbered women in U.S. medical schools by nearly 10 percent.

But it wasn’t her gender that made Rhonda stand out among her peers —it was her age.
At 47, the mother of two teenage girls was nearly twice as old as the average first-year med student. Just one-tenth of one percent of students are in their late 40s when they begin the arduous seven-year process to become a doctor.

"Behind the makeup, clothes and titles
we need to be okay with who we are.
Some of us are getting dressed and made up,
while inside we are broken."

When I was growing up, I wanted to be…
My earliest memory was wanting to help the less privileged. As a teenager, I wanted to become a fashion model. Later a business woman.

“I never wear this much makeup on a Saturday!” exclaimed one of the two lovely ladies I met outside the coffee shop in Waterfront Park in Beaufort. They both have big brown eyes, medium length brown hair and were wearing summery dresses with high clog heels.

Miranda Moss, Certified Family Nurse Practitioner, and Ashley Konoza, Doctor of Physical Therapy, look absolutely identical.  But they aren’t, they laugh. Everyone thinks that, they assured me, but they are fraternal twins. And yes, they had fun with that in school! 

At age 25, this ambitious little firecracker has already earned two masters degrees and started two companies. She teaches a few undergrad classes, and in her spare time, trains for half-marathons. When she needs a break, she reupholsters furniture.

“I’m a huge multitasker; always have been,” admitted Sierra, crediting the influence of her go-getter parents, who were always juggling a million things. Having grown up near Kennedy Space Center, it’s little wonder Sierra followed her own blazing star into the world of innovation. She attended the Nation’s first innovation academy at the University of Florida, where she was one of 16 inaugural graduates and the first woman from the program to go on and earn her masters in innovation. In 2017 she started Ginger Media, a marketing firm that creates strategies for small businesses through social media and graphic design. Add to that her Harvard certification in technology innovation and the $15K scholarship she was awarded at the European Innovation Academy (then located in Turino, Italy) and you can see this girl stays busy.

Through the lens of history, we look forward.

The year 2020 marks the 100th anniversary of the passage of the 19th Amendment, guaranteeing and protecting women’s constitutional right to vote. The passage marked the largest expansion of democracy in the history of our country. On August 18, 1920, the 19th Amendment  to the Constitution was ratified. On November 2 of that year, more than 8 million women across the United States voted in elections for the first time.

Jeanne Elmore of Beaufort is a member of both the American Association of University Women and the League of Women Voters. She is passionate about women’s rights, and her message to all women is: “Women didn’t get the right to vote, women had to fight for it.”

It came as a surprise later in life when Erin Reichert and Sarah Clemmons discovered that not everyone spent their formative years visiting random monuments across America. But the family’s extensive travels to national parks and historic sites gave these sisters a lasting love of history—or “sistory,” as they dubbed it after an hour-long jam session that revealed their fact-wielding nerd-prowess.

“You know you’re pretty deep into history when your vacations are to the Herbert Hoover Presidential Library,” quipped Sarah, who confessed to liking presidents “with a little bit of tarnish on them,” particularly Lyndon B. Johnson.