Motivation, July 2014

“Starting a new way is never easy so...keep starting until the start sticks”
- Tim Fargo

I am a reader. I read anything from novels to pamphlets to Facebook posts to recipe books. Sometimes, whatever I’m reading merely occupies time; however, sometimes, I feel like I just discovered a pot of gold. Recently, a golden nugget post came across my news feed on Facebook. It was an article that someone shared entitled “30 Things to Start Doing For Yourself.” I was intrigued, so I clicked on it and began to read.

I found the list to be motivating. Of course, some struck a chord for me more than others. Here are four that I want to share with you:

No. 1 on the list is: Start spending time with the right people.
This is a lesson I learned soon after I started the company. Through years of life-coaching sessions, I learned about toxic people, how they brought me down, how I allowed them to negatively impact me and how I needed to weed them out of my life. Employees, particularly bad ones, taught me how important it was to have the right people in place in the business. The more I learned about the importance of surrounding yourself with the right people, the quicker I would weed out the wrong people. I was really slow in the beginning. However, this is a crucial concept; hanging with the right people changes everything.
This concept reminds me of a funny quote by comedienne Brett Butler, “The older I get the simpler the definition of maturity seems: It’s the length of time between when I realize someone is a jackass and when I tell them that they’re one.”

No. 8 on the list is: Start being more polite to yourself.
Do you ever catch yourself talking ugly? Not to others, but to yourself? Do you say things like: “I look terrible;” “Gosh, I’m fat;” “I’m so stupid;” “I can’t do that.” “I can’t afford that;” “I can’t cook;” “I’ll never have any money;” “Nobody wants to date me;” “I would never fit in;” or “Life sucks.”? If you do, stop it. Stop it right now.
This negative chatter that cavorts around your brain like it owns the place does not serve you. Tell me one thing mentally tearing yourself down does to move you forward, make you happy or solve the problem. Women are notorious for bombarding themselves with negative self-talk, but here’s a question for you? If a friend talked to you this way would you remain friends? Would you allow someone to talk to your children this way? No and no, so why continue allowing the attacks on yourself?

No. 16 on the list is: Start cheering for other people’s victories.
Often we get so wrapped up in the lack of our own happiness that we are not willing to share in other’s successes. I wrote an article years ago entitled, “Must Be Nice.” The premise was how discouraging it is when you’re excited about something and the response you get from the friend or family member you’re sharing your good news with is: “Must be nice.” I beg you to grasp this concept without doubt: Other people’s happiness, success and victories do not take away from yours. There is not a bucket of limited happiness in the universe waiting to be depleted on a first come, first served basis. The bucket of happiness is overflowing and endless; just show up and you can get all you ever wanted.  There’s just one catch: You actually have to be willing to be happy.

No. 20 on the list is: Start listening to your own inner voice.
Every bad thing that has come my way has been because I didn’t listen to my gut feeling. Humans, especially women, have a powerful inner guide that knows the deal. This guide lets us know things early on, too. Unfortunately, we have a tendency of not listening to or believing this wise, all-knowing inner voice until it’s too late. How many times have you ignored your gut feelings, only to wish you had listened. Let’s make a pact right now: I, (state your name), will listen to and obey my gut feelings. Even if they are wrong, it will work out for the best in the long run, because so far in life, not once have I wished I wouldn’t have listened to my intuition.

I encourage you to read the rest of the list at www.marcandangel.com/2011/12/18/30-things-to-start-doing-for-yourself/. It is deeply thought provoking and some of the other suggestions may resonate with you more than the four I chose. Or, make your own list. No one knows better than you what you should start doing for yourself. It just takes thought, planning and implementation—something we do for birthday parties, weddings and work. Isn’t your one precious life worth the same effort? Let me answer that for you. YES, it is.

Think Pink,
Elizabeth Skenes Millen