What's the Secret?

February 2026 Issue

 

From couples just a few years into marriage to those celebrating more than half a century together, love comes in many forms—and the wisdom each couple has gained is as unique as their journey.

We asked four local couples, married anywhere from 2 to 58 years, to reveal their secret to staying happily married. Their answers are heartfelt, practical, honest, and sometimes downright funny, showing that “happily ever after” is a mix of commitment, communication, and, occasionally, a little humor.

Janet & Richard MacDonald

Married: 40 years
Dated: 2 1/2 years before engagement

What advice do you have for couples who are engaged or thinking about getting married? Seek counseling from a pastor or professional counselor before getting married.

How did you meet? We both moved to Hilton Head Island in 1980 but didn’t meet until 1982 (when Hilton Head was first incorporated) at a celebration party for Wes Jones, who was appointed to the first town council. We were among the few people who were both from South Carolina on the island at the time, and we had mutual friends. One of Richard’s fraternity brothers married my best childhood friend.

How have you been able to overcome obstacles for 40 years? Supporting each other and working together as we raised three sons. Through the easy times and difficult times, we have grown closer and stronger as a couple.

How did you know she was THE one? After dating for a couple years, I was transferred to Virginia to sell a real estate development. As the saying goes “distance makes the heart grow fonder—that’s when I knew Janet was the one. Janet: I knew early on in our dating I wanted to marry Richard. Plus, he was from the area of SC that my grandmother had lived in her early years, and she always called it “God’s country.”

Describe your marriage in 3 words:
Richard: Commitment, Loving, Flexible
Janet: Dedicated, Compatible, Honorable

What are you most looking forward to? Traveling together and seeing more of the USA and the world, as well as sharing more family times with our children, their spouses and
our grandchildren.

 

Mary & Kyle Harbin

Married: 21/2 years
Dated: 41/2 years before engagement

What advice do you have for newlyweds? The newlywed phase is a huge adjustment period. We suggest communicating as much as possible. Never look at a situation like it’s “you vs. the other,” but rather it’s “us vs the issue.” You are a team and both of you are adjusting and both of you have feelings.

What’s your love language?
Mary: Words of Affirmation
Kyle: Acts of Service

What’s the funniest thing that’s ever happened to you as a couple? Our first trip together was to camp in Asheville. NC. We spent the first day hiking and being with nature. We spent the night in a tent at a beautiful campground. The second day we explored the town, shopped, and enjoyed the restaurants. That night, the campground was eerily quiet. I made a comment about bears when we were cleaning up. Kyle told me not to worry because “no bears would be coming around here.” Neither of us could sleep, tossing and turning until about 1:00 A.M. I told Kyle, “I can’t stop thinking about bears.” Before I could finish, Kyle interrupted and said, “If you want to leave, I’m down to drive through the night.” We both laughed and couldn’t believe we were packing up in the middle of the night, but we were so freaked out! It was a moment where we both were thinking the same thing. Oh well, at least we saw Asheville and didn’t have any encounters with bears.

What song instantly reminds you of each other?
Mary: You Are In Love by Taylor Swift | Kyle: Wanna Be Loved by Red Clay Strays

What keeps you together and happy? We are better people when we are together. We both are very driven with a strong work ethic. We would not do well working with negative or unmotivated people. We push each other to be better humans. If one of us is at a low, we build the other up. We have created a relationship where both of us can be happy and thrive.

Describe your relationship in 3 words?
Mary: balanced, strong, compassionate | Kyle: busy, growing, entertaining

What’s something you are excited about to experience next together? We are excited to grow our family and experience parenthood. We are fortunate to both have parents who are happily married and who have modeled good parenting while having a strong partnership. Having good examples as parents have always made us excited to have a family of own.

 

Michelle
& Johnny Gordon

Married: 18 years
Dated: 4 years before engagement

What advice do you have for newlyweds OR to couples who may be struggling? Newlyweds: Be prepared, willing, and committed to growing together; Struggling Couples: If there is one thing you could improve about yourself to make your marriage stronger…DO IT!! Your marriage is worth it!

Did you ever have doubts?
Never! We knew we were made for each other. However, there was a little fear and nervousness because although marriage is beautiful, it’s a huge commitment.

What’s the funniest thing that’s ever happened to you as a couple? During our early dating days, after a movie date, Johnny took me home and suddenly began experiencing some stomach trouble. When he asked to use my bathroom, I neglected to mention that we were having plumbing issues at the time. Let’s just say that after the cleanup, we knew we were bonded forever—LOL! To this day, we still laugh about it.

What song instantly reminds you of each other?
The song With You by Tony Terry perfectly describes how we feel when we’re together.

What keeps you together and happy?
Our faith in God fuels our love, understanding, patience, and keeps us together. We understand that we impact each other’s happiness, and we take this seriously. Therefore, in our choices and actions, we consider how they will affect one another, and we make decisions collectively. We openly express our love, we pray together, we value our time together, and we are continuously working on our communication skills. We really love the life we’ve built together, including our sons and grandchildren.

How did you realize she is your person?
As a single man, I always knew what I didn’t want but didn’t really know what I wanted. From the moment I met and talked to Michelle, I instantly knew she was who and what I wanted. I’m so thankful the feeling was reciprocated.
Michelle: I knew Johnny was my person when after talking to him for the first time, I couldn’t stop thinking about him. I looked forward to every conversation and every moment together. All my senses—my mind, soul, and heart—fell in love with him, and I knew without a doubt, he was my forever.

Describe your relationship in 3 words?
Johnny: Gift from God | Michelle: Committed to Love

What’s something you are looking forward to? We are excited about experiencing retirement together. Johnny retired in 2023, and I am scheduled to retire in 2031. We look forward to traveling at our own pace and creating new memories together.

 

 

Susan & Joe Patton

Married: 58 years

Dated: About 6 months, but we worked for the same employer, so we interacted in all sorts of situations most every day.

What advice do you have for newlyweds?
During the first heady years of marriage, your love for each other will be all-consuming. Cherish the time you have as a couple before children take center stage. Do some dreaming and planning. Build and commit to a strong savings/financial/investment plan. Gather a support system of family, friends, and faith. Get the “business” of marriage in place: savings, medical insurance, property insurance, advance directives, a will. You will be surprised how important these will become to your peace of mind later on.

What’s something your spouse does (without being asked) that makes a big difference to you?
Joe: “We balance each other out. Susan has no head for business.”
Susan: “I agree. Joe is happily the “business” person in our family who takes care of our finances, insurance, maintenance, cars, etc – and he has taught our children to be responsible adults. That’s not tiny; it’s HUGE.”
Joe: “We intuitively know many of the other’s needs and act in anticipation of them. After all these years, it still amazes us that one will say something just as the other is about to say the same thing!”

What have you overcome that you couldn’t have without your spouse?
The death of our son in 2004 at age 33 in a glider crash. Rainbows and feathers frequently remind us of his spiritual presence.

What keeps you together and happy?
For more than 59 years, we’ve built a life and a family that provides us all with love, room to grow, safety, security, and a lifetime of wonderful memories. Our love and affection for each other, our commitment to each other, and the faith we share nurture that. It certainly helps that we enjoy many of the same things.

What song instantly reminds you of each other?
Lara’s Theme from the film Doctor Zhivago,
popularly called Somewhere My Love.

How did you realize she was THE one?
Spending time with her parents, whom I admired; Susan was a lot like them.
Susan: I knew Joe was “the one” when we worked on a project to be presented to management. Joe was the project manager and deserved center stage, but as we began our presentation, he stepped back and let me present our findings, then backed me up. I knew then how kind he was.