Ruth Brown & Geneva Cordray

 The lifecycle of a human being is an incredible process. Those who share our journey from cradle to grave become threads in our fabric of life. It used to be common to find parents, grandparents and grandchildren, all living under the same roof, exchanging tales of their daily activities, strengthened by each other's care. But today, we find the young isolated in their own culture and the elderly retired to facilities where their basic needs are met by nonfamily members. Ruth Brown was determined that this separation of souls would not be the fate of her mother, Geneva Cordray, affectionately known as Gin.

When Gin's husband became ill in 2000, Ruth suspended her life in Kingston, New York, and moved back to Bluffton to help take care of her stroke-stricken stepfather. After his death in 2005, she remained to care for her mother. An only child, Ruth stands firm that she sacrificed nothing to perform this duty. "It's only natural that I take care of my mom," she said.

Seventy-five and 92 years old respectively, Ruth and Gin were raised by the same woman, Gin's grandmother, Hagar, in the same house, built in 1910, where they now reside. Relaxed together on a day bed by the den window, they reminisce about the old days in Bluffton when horses and buggies trailed past their home. They sometimes recite stories to each other and jokingly dance to songs that Hagar taught them as children.

"These days, people don't spend much time with their children," said Ruth. "They have the children, but don't want to be responsible for them." Gin, on the other hand, makes no excuses for having been a protective mother. "She was very strict," said Ruth, who had to be in the yard at home when the street lights came on at dusk. She could not swim without adult supervision and was not allowed to pick berries in the woods because snakes were plentiful.

As a child, Ruth may have felt that she gave up a lot to be raised the right way, but she admits that her mother made the real sacrifice. Gin believed, as many black parents did in the 20th century, that education was the key to unlock the doors to opportunity and advancement. Gin worked as a cook for a man who scolded her that she was wasting her money by sending Ruth to Mather School in Beaufort, a boarding school established in 1867, to educate the daughters of freed slaves. In spite of discouragement, Gin continued to pay half her monthly paycheck to cover the cost of Ruth's schooling. Gin told Ruth she did not want her washing pots and pans like she had to do for over 30 years. Gin did not complete her high school training, but she and her husband, whom she married when Ruth was 12 years old, saw to it that their daughter secured a college education.

It has been a life of give and take, and Ruth and Gin have survived because of their mutual respect and support of community. Being a single mom back then had its challenges, but it was not a burden, said Gin. The extended family of relatives and friends provided spiritual, moral and physical support.

"If I had two or three million dollars, I couldn't feel better," said Gin about having Ruth by her side.

And Ruth would do anything for her mother. "I guess I'm from the old school," she said. "I say, don't forget where you came from and how you got there."