Doris & Phyllis Doyle

Like Mother, Like Daughter

Free long-distance in the 80s meant Doris (who lived in Florida at the time) could phone her daughter Phyllis (who lived in New Jersey) without incurring outrageous phone bills. As a result, Doris called Phyllis each night at 9 p.m. Although mother and daughter now live just ten minutes apart from each other in Sun City, the nightly tradition has not stopped. "We routinely check in on each other," Phyllis stated. "I want to go to bed knowing Mom has had a good day." And that's usually the case.

Doris, at age 87, could be the poster child for Del Webb's signature destination for active adults age 55 and better. "Since moving here mom seems ten years younger," Phyllis admitted. People banding together over a shared interest is the lifeblood of a Del Webb community, and both mother and daughter have fully embraced this belief.

Doris goes twice a week to the Sit and Be Fit class at the community pool. She maintains memberships in two singles clubs, the Solo Club for people without spouses and the Widow and Widowers' Club. She also checks in with NARFE (National Association of Retired Federal Employees). On the other hand, Phyllis belongs to the Line Dancing Club and the Sun Dancers. Phyllis took it upon herself to unite former United Way members and established a Sun City United Way Friends and Volunteers club, and Doris is right there by her side, helping to make sure club events run smoothly.

"When Mom moved here from Florida, I was hoping she would find one or two good buddies, but instead she has a much larger network of great club members who have become her friends," Phyllis said. Doris scours the Sun City newsletter each month to find out what she would like to do. Then it's a matter of coordinating calendars with Phyllis and her friends. Should they meet at the lake and carpool? Will Dick, her neighbor, self-appointed chauffer and fellow club member, pick her up? It all must be decided upon ahead of time.

The phrase "active adults" doesn't begin to describe this dynamic duo. Not only do they get involved in their community, mother and daughter travel across the country and world together. They've taken trips to Oklahoma City to attend reunions celebrating Doris's husband's military career. They've been to London, England to explore the area where Doris's mother grew up. They were there in May 2002, in time to help celebrate the Queen's Jubilee.

"When other women see me with Mom, they tell me how lucky I am," Phyllis said. "The truth is we're friends and we enjoy doing things together."

Doris helps Phyllis put together and deliver goodies bags for her Mary Kay business. She also takes Phyllis and her husband John out to dinner once a week. Mother and daughter are in the habit of scheduling a girls' day out, another delightful tradition that started years ago with other female family members. Whether it's a trip to Wal-Mart or the post office, they generally end up enjoying lunch at a local restaurant or an afternoon latte at Starbucks. Daytrips to Savannah are often thrown into the mix as well.

Although they live separately in their own homes, Phyllis and Doris are constant companions, and as a result, best friends. Theirs is an unusually harmonious relationship. Phyllis is one hundred percent right: it should be savored and celebrated.


Up Close:

When it comes to gardening: Phyllis has a brown thumb. Doris tosses seeds in a pot and something grows, though her Topsy Turvy Tomatoes plants did not fare so well this summer.
Nicknames: Doris is affectionately called "Bubbie" by her grandson and two great grandchildren. Friends and family call Phyllis "Phyl." Then there's Phyllis' husband John, frequently referred to as the "Health Nut of the Month" by friends and neighbors. His mother-in-law calls him "Honey", but not when he's present.
Lifelong best friends: Phyllis has Jo Ann and Doris had Etta, who has since passed away; however, daughter Janet has filled her mother's spot with aplomb.