Couples Q & A

Q: What is your best memory of your spouse?

Carol: Just after we were married Phil had been assigned to become the C.O of the Marine Barracks in Charleston (SC). We traveled from Southern California there. My daughter Angela was 7 years old. Everything was new—new family, school, surroundings and no friends yet. We were at Middleton Plantation for an annual jousting tournament competition. The horses galloped by with their mounts. Angela could not take her eyes off the horses. Phil noticed and asked if she would like to learn to ride a horse. She said she would. That opened up a whole new world for Angela, where she thrived as a horsewoman winning trophies at several Charleston area equestrian competitions.
Phil: Carol’s son Anthony was attending Charleston Southern University and was a member of the Air Force ROTC unit. His goal was to become a pilot. He planned to get a head start on his goal by earning his private pilots license through the Charleston Air Force Base program. Having received his license, he asked if we would like to go flying with him. His mother was terrified of flying but agreed to join us. (That is called an act of love). The aircraft was a single engine, wing over craft with four seats. With Anthony in the pilot’s seat and Angela next to him, that left Carol and I in the rear seats. I will never forget the stranglehold she had on my left arm and her pale look from the blood draining from her face. Once back on the ground, she congratulated her son for his success and swore she would never do that again.
Phil and Carol, Bluffton, Married 40 years

Q: What drives you crazy about your spouse?

SUSAN: The way he looks at me when we are at a social gathering from across the room drives me crazy in a good way. He is so particular about the way his closet is color coordinated, especially his golf shirts, they are hung by color and all facing the same way
TOM: She comes up with so many great ideas and concepts but doensn’t implement them. She thought of Angie’s List first!
Tom and Susan, HHI, Married 24 years

 

 

 

Q: What is your No. 1 advice for a newly married couple?

Tracey: Really respect your partner. It sounds simple, but relationship dynamics can be hard to change once set into motion, so start out on the right foot. Never belittle, demean or control your spouse with words, actions, or money. Appreciate their company. Go into a marriage as real partners, regardless of differing finances, ages, education and experiences.  Once you’re married, you’re a team. It’s you two against the world. No other relationship can be as important, or you could invite division into your life. The things you get upset over 99.9 percent of the time are merely misunderstandings or actions made because of different perspective. Listen to your spouse because the reasons we do what we do are almost always forgivable. Choose your moments of opposition very carefully. Words have consequences, so choose them wisely, and your home will be your safe place to land.
David: A yes and a yes is a yes. A yes and a no is a no. Translation: If one of you is on the fence or really doesn’t want to do, buy, or get something, don’t. Pressure never changes anyone’s actual feelings. (If you really know the answer to the question you’ve asked, respect it.)
Tracey and David, Bluffton, Married 10 years

 

Q: What was your first impression of your partner?

Shelia: “When I first met Marikay, I thought she was really cool and amazing, and really, kind of cute!”
Dr. Marikay: “When I first met Shelia, I met her at a bird show, and I thought she was a…   (long pause) stuck-up know-it-all!  (laughter)…  but she grew on me!”
Both:  “…and 25 years later, we’re still together!”
Dr. Marikay and Shelia, Port Royal, together 25 years.

 

 

 

Q: When you say, “Honey, they’re playing our song” what’s playing?

Lalie: OMG, it has to be K.C. and Jojo “All My Life.” We love ‘90’s R&B music just as much as we love each other! This February will be 15 years married. I wouldn’t want anyone else!
Brad: The song that is playing is “All My Life” by KC and Jojo. It describes our Internet born courtship that wasn’t so common 16 years ago. We were connected to the Internet through dial-up Internet service. It wasn’t pretty but our relationship is beautiful.
Lalie and Brad, Bluffton, Married 15 years

 

Q: What did you do on your first date?

Clarissa: We watched a Nicholas Cage movie called City of Angels and we’ve never been apart since!
Dale: Our first movie: City of Angels; First kiss was to Chris Isaak’s song “If I Ever Fall in Love” and the first thing she said to me: “I want you to give me babies with your eyes.”
Clarissa and Dale, Beaufort, Married 20 years

 

 

 

Q: When did you know you were in love?

Alison: You are assuming I am, and you are right. It instantly felt comfortable and right the moment I looked into his eyes. And every day the feeling grows stronger. When he said to me it feels like we have known each other since high school (which is not the case), I had to agree. When people tell you it will happen when you are not looking, well for me, that was the case. Such a blessing.
Mike: The first evening we met, she smiled at me when I sat next to her and we started talking to each other like we had known each other for a long time. I felt so close to her at that moment, I knew I wanted to be with her as often as I could. My love for her grows each day, as we make plans for our future together.
Alison and Mike, Hilton Head Island, Dating for 9-weeks