Ann Marie and Rob McPherson love living on Hilton Head Island.

They came here for years from the Washington, DC area for mini vacations to visit Rob’s parents, who had retired to the Island and settled in the beautiful Wexford community. After building a successful career, first as an officer on the USS Jacksonville fast attack submarine, then joining Accenture and rising quickly to partner, Rob and Ann Marie decided to join his parents in making Hilton Head their permanent home when Rob retired early. Naturally they bought in Wexford, too.

They had a beautiful, large home, but that house became a monstrosity when, soon after his retirement, Rob suffered a debilitating stroke at the age of 51, even though he was the picture of health. Left with many unknowns and a lot of new responsibilities, Ann Marie’s life also changed drastically, catapulting her into the driver’s seat for all McPherson family duties, responsibilities and decisions.

I have a personal question. It’s not intended to make you feel guilty (which is the mother of all useless emotions). It’s meant to tickle your neurons and invite thought.

What keeps you from exercising more?

You know you should. Exercise is the miracle cure for whatever ails you. Feeling tired? Depressed? Overcome with stress?

Get your body in motion. Regular, rhythmical exercise—over time—also helps prevent heart disease, diabetes and high blood pressure and is your truest and best friend when it comes to living a healthier, happier lifestyle.

But you know all that. Shoulda, woulda, coulda...

So what’s the answer? What keeps you from exercising more?

Memory Matters’ Brain Health Summit is coming up next month—March 11. Its name—Brain Health Summit—may sound intimidating, boring, or too scientific, but it’s anything but!This fun, educational event provides the most up-to-date information on the importance of brain health, how you can keep your brain young, and what innovations are underway to cure Alzheimer’s disease.

There’s nothing like a good story. Our imagination is ignited, our curiosity is elevated and our desire for knowledge is quenched. The Lowcountry boasts fantastic, true stories based on local history, and one of the best places to learn more is the Morris Center for Lowcountry Heritage in Ridgeland. It’s a learning and exhibition center dedicated to preserving and nurturing the history, culture and spirit of Jasper County and surrounding counties.

Their mission is to cultivate community understanding through education, preservation and celebration of the region’s rich history and culture. It is a facility where a wide diversity of people can gather to explore and learn about the area’s distinctive sense of place. Visitors will find dynamic exhibits, interactive learning opportunities, cultural offerings, storytelling and art. Executive Director Tamara Herring said, “We have a vast array of exhibitions where you can learn about the culture and traditions of the Lowcountry and enjoy the benefits of learning about where we live.”

I saw the funniest sign, but it wasn’t funny for long because I started to think about it. Suddenly, the humor melted away. The sign read: “Everything happens for a reason. Sometimes the reason is you’re stupid and make bad decisions.”

Ouch! Those 15 words hit hard because I’ve made more than my share of bad money decisions in my life.

I’ve come a long way from that dark season of my life. I am determined to not go back but also to not live with regret for what might have been.

Born September 4, 1940 in Williamstown, New Jersey, and gifted with a huge heart, there is no doubt the late Mr. Thomas L. Curry was one special human. Growing up on a large farm in New Jersey, hunting, gathering and farming filled his daily life. Little did he know he would have a life-changing experience that would not only alter his mindset about life, but also change his heart, too.

When Thomas was in his early twenties, he was hunting with a friend, one of their common pastimes. His friend shot a deer but it did not kill it completely. While the friend didn’t seem to care as much, Thomas could not stop thinking about the deer. The next weekend, he found the deer hidden in a bush, biting away at itself, trying to get the bullet out of its body. With the gruesome scene and tears shed, Thomas decided right then and there his hunting days were over.

Writing has helped Vernie Singleton overcome a lot in her life. A very quiet child, almost to the point of being a hermit, Vernie never spoke out or spoke up. Whether it was at school in the classroom or at home she kept most of her thoughts to herself.

“Writing is a healing process. It helps me regurgitate and process my feelings and organize my thoughts. Writing has been a way for me to take my time and communicate my thoughts and things I want to say,” said Vernie.

Years ago, I was a guest on “The Maury Povich Show,” something I’ve never been that proud of. Back then, the show was kind of raunchy, and I just now realized that, some 20 years later, Maury is still at it.

I remember a few things about the show, like what I wore (What was I thinking?) and the nice production staff. Maury was very kind, too.

To say the last two years have been tough is an understatement. The COVID-19 pandemic has turned our lives upside down. The world literally stopped in March, 2020. Everything came to a screeching halt, schools and businesses went virtual overnight, restaurants and theaters closed, and travel shut down indefinitely. Yet, in the midst of this crazy “new normal”, we all desperately sought ways to stay connected with friends, colleagues and, especially, our families.

Have you ever tried walking meditation? It’s a gentle and giant step into the world of Zen. And in case you’ve just returned from planet Elsewhere, Zen is trending big here on Earth. There are Zen retreats, Zen smoothies, Zen comics, Zen methods of diapering and accounting and an actual book called “Zen and the Art of Casino Gaming.”

“Zazen” is the Japanese word for seated meditation, and kinhin is walking meditation. Both are proven methods for quieting the mind. Kinhin is a simple practice that gives you all the benefits of seated meditation—increased energy, equanimity, awareness—with zero risk of falling asleep.

Life is busy. No doubt about it. We hustle to work, take the kids to school and soccer and dance lessons, rush around to shop, cook, clean, we bring work home with us, participate in our church, club, and other social opportunities. It’s no wonder our culture has become one of convenience—pre-packaged foods, fast food restaurants, pizza delivery and comfort food overload. Stress is part of daily living, so we take a breath, if we remember, and push on. As such, we have become disconnected from nature, from each other, from a quality home life. It is this very lifestyle that is making us collectively sick.

With the year coming to an end, spirits are lifted, presents are gifted, and hearts are shifted.
The holidays bring out the giving spirit, but we found some ladies who are
dedicated to keeping spirits high all year round.

We are pleased to introduce you to these amazing leaders of just a few of the
Lowcountry’s finest organizations, all led by women.

Over the next six pages, enjoy learning and feeling the spirit of giving through caring souls,
advocacy and adoration for the Lowcountry and the people who live here.

As a junior in high school, it was almost time to take midterm exams. I dreaded midterms, but my French teacher made us students an offer I couldn’t refuse: If you participated in the old folks Christmas food drive, she would add 10 points to your midterm score. To be perfectly honest, I didn’t have a clue what I was signing up for, but for 10 extra points, I would be there!

I arrived at our high school along with many others and saw hundreds of paper grocery bags lining the walls of the gym. With the bags all numbered and in perfectly straight lines, the organized chaos commenced. Apparently, if any student had overdue library fees in December, they were allowed to bring in two canned goods and all was forgiven. The high school also partnered with one of the local elementary schools that held a contest to see which class could collect the most canned goods. All the donated items were then divided and distributed evenly among the numbered bags.

No one wants to talk about dying, that is for sure. And planning your own funeral is something many don’t even want to discuss. However, deciding your funeral arrangements in advance can give peace of mind to both you and your family when the time comes.

Why plan ahead?
While a great funeral home with a compassionate and caring staff will help guide you in making funeral arrangements for your loved one, it is so much easier if that loved one had a say in the process before they passed. The immense emotions that come with laying a loved one to rest are counterintuitive to making big, lasting decisions. As with any big decision in life, it’s helpful to have time to research and consider options, and funeral planning is no exception.

Dear Carrie:
My husband and I are curious about long-term care insurance. It all seems so confusing. How can we decide if (and when) we should buy it, and if so, what kind?  —A Reader

Dear Reader:

Not only am I glad you’re investigating one of the biggest risks to retirement security. I’m also really happy you’re looking at this issue together. If either one of you ultimately needs long-term care, it will impact you both.

Long-term care (LTC) insurance comes in a variety of shapes and sizes, but all policies have some features in common. I’ve talked about some basics and the importance of LTC insurance before, but choosing a policy requires some extra thought. Here’s what you need to know.
There Are Two Types of Policies: Standalone and Hybrid

Around the age of 75, many women begin skipping the recommended annual or biennial screening mammogram. Mary Legree is not one of them.

Recognizing the critical role mammograms play in helping catch breast cancer early, the 80-year-old Lady’s Island resident has never failed to get the imaging test, even though she has no history of the disease in her family.

This summer, her vigilance paid off.

The grass needs cutting, the baseboards are covered in dust, you are just back from the grocery store and what in the world are you going to cook for dinner?

These chores are just a part of daily living. However, they were much easier when we were younger and had more energy, especially when the children were still home to help. Now these same chores can be daunting, worrisome and tiring.

Many adults complain about their droopy eyelids. Their complaints can be cosmetic (my mirror keeps telling me I look tired), functional (my droopy eyelids are limiting my side vision), or both. Droopy eyelids are typically the result of increasing skin laxity, fat pad exposure, or weakening of the muscles that help position and elevate the upper eyelids. All these factors are present to some degree as we age and are commonly family traits.

The EmpowerRF Experience.
EmpowerRF is right for almost every woman! With seven different treatments on one platform, there is basically something for everyone. Any woman with vaginal dryness, pain with intercourse, stress urinary incontinence, overactive bladder, vaginal laxity, or lichen sclerosis will benefit. EmpowerRF uses radio-frequency energy to stimulate thermal remodeling, which results in new collagen and elastin formation, making the tissue more supple and elastic. This allows the tissue to expand and retract without tearing and provides better support for the surrounding structures. 

Ah, the golden years! The Lowcountry is a playground for retirees to enjoy—the weather, golf, tennis, the beach. Yet as we age, we also face new circumstances and new challenges. As they say, aging is not for sissies. The wrinkled face we start to see in the mirror may or may not bother us. That’s more about vanity. However, when myriad medical issues send us to orthopedic surgeons to turn us into bionic men and women, or cardiac problems require stress tests, stents or bypass surgery, or cataracts impair our vision, we spend less time enjoying our favorite activities as our calendars become filled with doctor appointments. We notice that our opportunities for socialization are saturated with discussions of the medical issues we—and our friends—are experiencing.

Meet Terri Reiff. She is a breast cancer survivor, entrepreneur and ecstatic new grandmother. She is also the owner of five Stretch Zone franchises, including the studios on Hilton Head Island and Bluffton. Her ownership of these franchises arose from her own personal experience, and because of this, her businesses are her absolute passion.

“I see clients whose lives are changed every single day,” Terri said. And that’s when she told me her story. As the former owner of a large gym, Terri has always taken initiative in caring for her body through exercise and proper nutrition. She was working out with a personal trainer three times a week, and her back was killing her. She noticed at the end of each workout session, her trainer would stretch her for five minutes or so, and it was the only time she felt relief.

Around the age of 75, many women begin skipping the recommended annual or biennial screening mammogram. Mary Legree is not one of them.

Recognizing the critical role mammograms play in helping catch breast cancer early, the 80-year-old Lady’s Island resident has never failed to get the imaging test, even though she has no history of the disease in her family.

This summer, her vigilance paid off.

So here’s a question to ponder:
Can men and women have a platonic friendship? Some say no. When a man and a woman are close enough to become great friends, romantic feelings will arise on one side or the other—maybe both, if they’re lucky. It’s human nature, right?

Not so fast! On the other hand, there are those who think it preposterous to propose that a man and woman can’t keep a friendship purely friendly, with no signs of flirtatiousness anywhere to be found. Perhaps it is possible.

Open the door of the Church Mouse Thrift Shop and the first thing you notice isn’t the wonderful display of sparkling crystal, or the art on the wall, or even the stunning dining table and chairs so reasonably priced. It’s the happy chatter, smiling faces, laughter and welcoming words. It’s a warm and friendly place that buzzes with activity and cheerful banter between staff, volunteers and customers. The customers are thrilled with the bargains, and the volunteers and staff are eager to make suggestions, offer assistance and answer questions. The atmosphere is almost like a family reunion, a party where everyone seems to know everyone else.

More Americans than ever are hungry to transition to a less stressful, more meaningful way to celebrate this year's Thanksgiving holiday. If you're one of them, I have some ideas to share:
FIRST, A GUT CHECK. How do you know if Thanksgiving adds to your stress? Listen to your gut, seat of great wisdom. If thinking about Turkey Day makes you feel anxious instead of enthusiastic, something is wrong.

Maybe you feel the pressure to do everything perfectly. (I call that Martha Stewart syndrome.) Maybe you'd rather be a guest than a host. Sit calmly and meditate on where the stress is coming from. Write down your insights, without judging, without censoring.

Friendships are vital to our mental health, but one size does not fit all. As Hope explains in her book, quality and quantity of friendships are important. From acquaintances to closest friends, we need them all. “Humans need community,” Hope explained. It seems so obvious, but it’s important to remember. She explained the different types of friendships (a concept that Aristotle wrote about!) and how they are all important. They are Friendships of Utility (primarily acquaintances), Friendships of Pleasure (fun friends) and Friendships of the Good (soulmates or besties). Our happiness depends on all types, and some people will move between them as their relationships evolve.

Shortly after takeoff, the pilot circled over the Great Salt Lake, tipping the wings ever so slightly so we could witness the unusual reddish-purple color of the water—a phenomenon, he explained, that occurs when a particular species of algae meets up with a certain bacteria. It was quite fascinating.

Just as he was bringing the plane level so we could be on our way, CRACK! A loud kind of popping noise sent a chill up my spine. “I believe we’ve hit something, so we will be returning to the gate,” an audibly shaken pilot reported.

With the spirit of Halloween coursing through fall, October brings us all kinds of tricks and treats to enjoy throughout the month. One treat that is enjoyed, not only in fall, but year-round is the Bloody Mary. Originally created to cure a hangover, the Bloody Mary has become quite a gastric gourmet concoction, especially at brunch. Whether you like olives, pickles, spice, or no spice, these are one-of-a-kind drinks that can be mixed and mingled any way you like it. Adding to the morbidity of its name, the lore behind the Bloody boasts a haunting history that can tell its story for itself.

Though the history is as murky as tomato juice, this popular drink has myriad myths and legends of how it got its chilling name.

Not often does a name fit a purpose as well as one does in this case. EmpowerRF is a new device offered by InMode that actually empowers women. Its development, as well as the clinical studies, have all taken place right here in Bluffton at Advanced Women’s Care. EmpowerRF is a new feminine wellness treatment option that helps restore women’s lost confidence, lost sensuality and intimacy, and works to resolve painful consequences of the aging process, all while addressing urinary leakage. Does help like this actually exist?  The answer is yes; now it does!

EmpowerRF started as a thought, an idea between like minds. Could there be a device that helped women with the problems brought on by the challenges of life, childbirth, gravity and menopause?  At a conference in Dallas, this spark was lit and a revolutionary, noninvasive surgical device was created.