“She was not quite what you would call refined. She was not quite what you
would call unrefined. She was the kind of person that keeps a parrot.” - Mark Twain

Mark Twain would be surprised to know Patty Wagstaff, who uniquely redefines refined and unrefined. Not only does she have a parrot, but she takes it flying with her. And she is not a passenger, rather she is an award-winning, upside-down, barrel-rolling, low-flying, nose-diving aerobatic pilot.

To Patty Wagstaff the sky represents beauty, freedom, and challenge. A six-time member of the US Aerobatic Team, she is the first woman to win the title of US National Aerobatic champion and one of the to few win it three times.

Exciting things are happening in the world of poetry here in the Lowcountry! Not only is April National Poetry Month, a time dedicated to celebrating poets and their craft, but a Poetry Trail is in the making on Hilton Head. The trail will provide a creative way to immerse your soul into the beauty of our environment and the talents which abound. To celebrate and get in a poetic mood, here are the works of local poets for you to ponder and enjoy.

Are you having secret thoughts, dear reader, about jumping on your bike and pedaling up the road, foraging for fresh zucchinis at your farmers market, planning the kind of outdoor adventure that makes you feel happy, healthy and sweaty at the end of the day?

Of course you are. It's spring! Many people on the path are feeling that undeniable seasonal urge to get out and grow, to open up and sprout. But where do you begin?

I’m anything but a master of the soil, but I sure love to putter in my vegetable and flower gardens. And this year, with food prices continuing to soar, I am more motivated than ever to grow as much of our food as humanly possible.

Over the years, I’ve discovered quite a few handy tips that make my gardening so much more enjoyable. I hope you find something here that will help you, too!

SOAP ON A SPIGOT:
Cut the leg portion from a pair of spent, clean pantyhose. Drop a soap bar into the toe, tie a knot over it and tie the other end to an outdoor water spigot. Gardeners can easily wash up after work. Such a great idea because the soap is always handy, clean and dry.

What would you do if you had all the “business’’ of your life in order? What if all of your estate matters were planned and your wishes were all set? What if you had your financial plan in place, where you knew exactly what your retirement entailed, including checking some things off your bucket list. And, to take it all a step further, what if your funeral arrangements were already in place and paid for, and they were exactly what you wanted for your last celebration on earth? Imagine the sense of peace your family and loved ones would feel knowing you have made it easy for them. More importantly, imagine the assuredness and tranquility you will feel knowing your life is in order and your wishes will be respected.

There is a growing trend in estate planning to address the future needs
of not only your children, but also your grandchildren. Grandparents often want to leave something special for their grandchildren as an act of love.

What is the grandparent’s vision? What do they deem to be of value?
What do they want their token of love to be?

A consultation with an estate planning attorney can provide the answers to these and other questions to assist with creating a customized plan. Who are the children and grandchildren? How old are the grandchildren? Are there any family conflicts? What is the value of the estate? What are your grandchildren’s hopes and dreams? Do you want to gift now, during your lifetime, or after you pass? If so, how much?

No one wants to talk about dying, that is for sure. And planning your own funeral is something many don’t even want to discuss. However, deciding your funeral arrangements in advance can give peace of mind to both you and your family when the time comes.

Why plan ahead?
While a great funeral home with a compassionate and caring staff will help guide you in making funeral arrangements for your loved one, it is so much easier if that loved one had a say in the process before they passed. The immense emotions that come with laying a loved one to rest are counterintuitive to making big, lasting decisions. As with any big decision in life, it’s helpful to have time to research and consider options, and funeral planning is no exception.

I did not learn the importance of financial wellness until I was in my late twenties. It wasn’t a topic of conversation in school, or in my home with my parents.

My husband, on the other hand, had a completely different experience. While we were dating, being the engineer he is, he would write down everything he spent money on down to the penny. We would be getting gas, and he would be writing down how much he spent. If he bought a soda, he would write that down, too. To makes things worse, he insisted he pay my debt off before we got married, because he didn’t want any debt going into our marriage. I viewed his value of money the wrong way. It wasn’t until later that I began to appreciate his passion of thoroughly knowing our expenses and being debt free, as this was the foundation on which we started saving for retirement and making it a priority.

For many years I wouldn’t have anything to do with a budget because I couldn’t stand the idea of anyone—or anything—telling me how to spend my money. And where did that get me? Into one big financial mess.

Every month, when I ran out of money, I would turn to MasterCard and Visa for a bailout. Really bad idea.

What I learned from going through that experience and finding my way back to solvency is that, as much as we may loathe it, a budget is the ticket to financial happiness—not the straitjacket I feared it would be. I prefer to call this a “spending plan” rather than a budget, but honestly the terms are interchangeable.

The spring solstice is here with a secret and sparking message that everyone on the rocky path to a healthier lifestyle needs to hear: When the seasons change, we can, too.

“Springtime is in the air,” writes Kenneth Cohen, a Qigong master. “A good time for spring cleaning of mind and body through meditation, healing practices, eating spring greens ... and bathing in natural
hot springs.”

Before I shower you with my own suggestions, let me ask: What’s your No. 1 wish when it comes to living a healthier life?

(Think for a minute. These interactive columns are my favorites.)

The truth is we humans can make positive change any day—if we’re really ready, if we’re deeply committed. But in spring, Mother Nature gives us an extra cellular push. Spring is the season of new beginnings, new growth. In spring, when all things made of light turn toward the light, it’s easier for you to do the same.

The Art Center of Coastal Carolina has always been about enriching the community through the arts, and on March 23-26 you are invited to join in a very special event that will do just that!

The Center has put together a fabulous retreat aptly named the “Arts Re-Center Retreat”. This event is designed and created with you in mind. The last few years have been stressful so this event will allow and encourage you to come and “Re-flect, Re-nourish and Re-new” through exciting arts-based experiences. 

The instructors have a combined 80-plus years working in the field of visual arts, language arts and performing arts. Bringing these arts together will undoubtedly help you renew through reflection. 

With Valentine's Day on your mind—candles at dinner, red silk undies, chocolate-covered anything—now's a good time to think about your heart.

Thump, thump, thump. Don't be distracted by the obvious rhyme. Focus! When your heart gets sick, so do you. When it stops, you drop. There are many reasons to take care of your heart—oh, the thousands of dollars you'll save!—but preventing an early death is the biggie.

This Valentine's Day, open up to another truth about your heart that never gets enough attention, especially from our busy doctors: It needs loving. Giving and receiving.

Trying to pinpoint the essence and feeling of what it was
like to be raised on a small island eludes me.
The nature of it dangles before me,
but I can’t quite catch it or wrap my words around it.
Is it a Lowcountry sunset over the Intracoastal Waterway?
Or is it the connection to nature and wildlife that makes
it such a unique place to live?
Maybe it’s the strong community of people?

I have tried for years to explain to friends all over the world what it was like to grow up in paradise—the Lowcountry of South Carolina—Hilton Head Island. Never could I find the right words to illuminate or describe the fullness of my childhood place. But this is the beauty of it, too. This well-kept, secret place gave me and my childhood friends refuge from the bigger, busier, more complicated world, which allowed us a moment in time to just be kids—where we felt invincible and untouchable on our 13-mile island.

I can recall vividly—and count on one hand—the migraine headaches I’ve had in my life, all of which were before age 10. Once I turned double digits, I outgrew them ... until a couple of months ago.

With no warning at all, there I was back to my 8-year-old self, flat on my back with a raging migraine. Why now, after all these years?

In reading up on the latest findings, I discovered how important magnesium is to our overall health. Turns out that 80% of the U.S. population suffers from magnesium deficiency causing all kinds of health issues, one of them being migraine headaches. And here’s the problem with that: Magnesium supplements are not necessarily the answer because it is not easily absorbed through the digestive tract.

There are moments in our lives where it is imperative to shine. The job interview is one of them. You have 7 seconds to make a good first impression, a mere flash to convey your best self. Are you prepared? Do you know your value? Have you researched the company or school you are applying to? Do you know the job description or school program inside and out?

Many go into interviews unprepared and shoot from the hip. Some can’t get control of their nerves and fail to communicate their best self because of it. There are many things that can go wrong in an interview, and you may never know what, you simply know you didn’t get the job. There is a method to the interviewing madness, and if you follow Author Donne Greco Paine’s 4 Interview Pillars you are more likely to get a job offer.

The north end of Hilton Head Island has cause to celebrate. A new, local, fine dining establishment has planted itself firmly in the neighborhood and whisked open its welcoming doors. Owner and seasoned restauranteur Earl Nightingale purchased the old, boarded-up Outback Steakhouse building and renovated it into something extra special, with no remnants of blooming onions anywhere to be found. Meet Celeste; she is the beautiful, friendly and delicious new restaurant everyone is flocking to. North end residents are ecstatic to have such a quality restaurant that doesn’t require a trek down the Cross Island Expressway. But there is much more to be ecstatic about Celeste than that.

Let’s talk about what makes a restaurant a favorite—one that is tightly snuggled into your familiar restaurant rut—because these are the reasons you will adore Celeste and welcome her to your short list.

You don't need me to tell you that we're living in uncertain economic times.

One day, stocks are plummeting and home foreclosures are skyrocketing; the next day, things seem to be looking up.

But whether the economy is good or bad, expenses keep rising.

There's the mortgage and the car payments to deal with and all of your other necessary expenses.

But what about the big-ticket items? Something like a busted water heater often hits without warning and with the potential to blow a giant hole in your finances.

The secret for handling a big money decision isn't to grab the credit cards. Instead, you need to anticipate these expenses, divide them into manageable pieces and make them as routine as paying the phone bill.

“Adam” is a guy I’ve created to illustrate one big and fascinating idea from a book by British psychotherapist William Pullen: Movement Is Medicine.

Yes! Forget the word “exercise” for now. Just moving our bodies—walking, dancing, jogging, preferably in nature—can help free us from stress, emotional pain and whatever else we’re dealing with that makes our bodies feel stuck, unsettled and depressed.

This therapeutic connection between the mind and body isn’t a theory; it’s a fact of life. Your body is self-healing and wondrous, and when you move it, you automatically get the health benefits that come from the blood and lymph flowing, the molecules of emotion circulating, the tissues nourished, the joints juiced.

And when you add mindfulness to movement, therapist Pullen explains, you’re on a self-directed path to enhanced well-being, physical and mental.

Owner Robert Saxton of Chophouse 119 emphatically stated, “You’re not going to get a better cut of filet in America.” And after savoring every bite of the 12-ounce, center-cut, cooked to medium rare perfection filet, I agree. I am not a connoisseur of beef, but Robert and Executive Chef Daniel Williamson are, and they have brought their expertise and passion for high quality and excellence to Hilton Head Island.

“We are all about the steaks. We source them from New York City and Pat LaFrieda, America’s most celebrated butcher. The beef is cultivated from small specialty farms, which offers our dining patrons a higher experience overall,” Robert explained.

Christina Wilson is a successful young executive with diplomas on the wall, and her “to do” files neatly spread upon her desk. She is very pretty, polished and articulate, but the day I interviewed her, she was just a mom, a mom who had the unthinkable happen. Her 16-year-old daughter, Emmy, was killed in an automobile wreck on December 17, 2019, and in the last three years, Christina and her husband, Jason, have been through the depths of grief, searching for ways to celebrate their special girl.

According to Christina, Emmy would just love having this Pink article about her. She enjoyed being the one having “her name in lights” and was described as “larger than life,” and she “took all the oxygen out of a room when she entered it.”

The Christmas Spirits on Tradd Street
by Karen White

“Karen White is a favorite of mine and she hit the magical mark with this one!”

Whether you’ve been involved in Author Karen White’s Tradd Street series or not, this Christmas page-turner has it all—ghosts, history, intrigue, wit, romance and adventure. This is a fun read that will add joy, mystery and a few spine-tingling moments to your holidays, sending you to bed early to get in a few minutes—wink, wink—of reading prior to nodding off!

Synopsis: Two years after The Guests on South Battery became a New York Times hardcover bestseller, the quirky, doughnut-loving, schedule-obsessed heroine Melanie Trenholm returns. Finally married to true-crime bestselling author Jack Trenholm, they are living in Melanie’s historic Charleston home with their 18-month old twins and Jack’s 15-year-old daughter. But domestic bliss can’t last for long. A new passel of spirits have also taken up residence at 55 Tradd Street, and they need Melanie’s help to right old wrongs and solve a mystery.

If you're still struggling with your holiday gift list, help is on the way. I've got a lot of swell ideas for you this year, none of them digital or a novelty watch with a dancing Rudolph.

YOU FIRST.
This year, follow the wisdom of the Shopping Bodhisattva and give yourself the gift of not overspending. Debt equals stress. If the gifts I'm suggesting are beyond your budget, give hugs. Or bake banana bread. Or do what I did when I was a kid: Make up your own coupon good for a foot rub, car wash, or three nights of kitchen cleanup.

(Action Alert: The personal service coupon—a gift I still love to give and receive—could involve finding scissors and cardboard. If you just want to take a piece of plain paper and scribble "This coupon is good for one jar of my homemade lentil-and-spinach soup," be my guest.)

Plants make me happy. An unexpected bloom, a plant that recently perked up, or a clipping that’s finally taken root is all it takes to bring a smile to my face. Throughout the summer my garden thrives with summer-loving hibiscus plants and a plethora of succulents—my green thumb shines. But, as the temperatures begin to plummet, so does my garden inspiration. This year I decided to head to The Greenery, for a fall and winter planter crash course with the one-and-only Carol Guedalia, one of the two resident horticulturists at The Greenery’s Garden Center.

As I explained my conundrum, my first lesson was apparent. While all those Pinterest-worthy fall containers grace many porches as soon as October rolls around, here in the Lowcountry it’s just too hot. Deemed “Indian Summer,” fall plants will simply “melt” in our early fall heat. So, it’s important to to think more “fall/winter” when it comes to choosing your plants while sipping your Pumpkin Spice Latte in 85-degree heat.

Human beings are social creatures,
which is why screens are not enough to meet our social needs.
All it took was a prolonged pandemic for our kids to replace interpersonal
social skills with social media and screen skills.
If you’ve noticed a decline in the younger generation’s appetite
to socialize in person, you’re not alone.

On the outside, kids are clowning around on Snapchat or TikTok, laughing at memes, and entertaining friends with filters and altered photos. In reality, and in too many cases, their mental health has taken a dive while they were trying to cope with being put on hold. They’re worried about how they’ll catch up. According to research, 82 percent of Generation Z members believe they’ve been traumatized. While it sounds extreme, many of them feel postponed, pushed aside, or penalized. Analysis from the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention tells us that 37 percent of high school students said they were experiencing poor mental health due to anxiety. That’s one in every three students.

What is WAHHI?
It is the Womens Association of Hilton Head Island, and it is 1005 members strong. Now in its 61st year, WAHHI started in 1961 as a small garden club with the goal of keeping the plants in Coligny Circle looking neat and beautiful. The organization’s mission no longer involves Coligny Circle, but its most recent kickoff to the 2022/23 year was a major event held at Celebration Park, which is just a stone’s throw from it.

This large, powerful group of women still strive to do good things for the women of the Lowcountry. The goals of the organization are to promote the natural and cultural beauty of the Island, encourage projects which benefit the community, and facilitate communication among the women of the Lowcountry.

More Than the Food
Thanksgiving is a holiday most people connect to food—turkey, mashed potatoes, dressing (or stuffing), cranberry sauce, yams, green bean casserole, pumpkin or apple pie—ideally shared with a lot of family members around a big table, followed by dessert in a cozy den while watching football games on a big-screen TV.

I think about Thanksgiving along those lines, too, but my favorite memory has little to do with the food. As a kid growing up in the suburbs of Long Island, New York, I ran downstairs on Thanksgiving morning to turn the TV on at precisely 9 o’clock for the annual Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade. I didn’t want to miss any float, marching band, or giant balloon—cartoon characters like Popeye, Underdog, the Cat in the Hat, as well as a giant turkey—floating high above the streets. I wanted to see what the Rockettes were wearing, and which celebrities on the floats stopped to sing and wave to the crowd in front of Macy’s Herald Square. It could be raining, snowing, windy and cold, or as pleasant as a spring day, and families still lined up on the sidewalks in droves, while some were lucky enough to be standing in the windows of buildings along the parade route on Manhattan’s Upper West Side.

Sickness happens. It’s part of life, the not-fun part. Even though you’re a ferocious warrior for your own well-being, doing all you can do to exercise with joy, keep your immune system strong, get enough sleep, eat real food and help love, or at least like, your neighbor, still, health setbacks are unavoidable.

That’s why I want to share this recent email from Theresa G.:
Dear Marilynn: I try hard as I can to stay healthy, eat right and exercise. I was on a good roll recently. I would go to the gym in the morning, do a 30-minute workout and then head out to a trail close to my home and ride my bike for an hour. Then I hit a brick wall. What I thought was a cold turned out to be pneumonia. I have been down for almost a month. The medicine helped to reduce the symptoms, but the side effects took a (different) toll on my body. I had insomnia, jitters, weight gain because of the prednisone and a horrible taste in my mouth because of the antibiotic. What is your advice about getting back to a healthy routine while still recovering from such a blow? Thanks. —Theresa G.

One of the strongest things a woman can do is to ask for help when she needs it. No one should have to go through struggles or fight battles alone. For those who want to help, it can be difficult to know how. Luckily, there’s a website for that. Whether what’s needed is financial, emotional or nutritional, helpers and those in need can get connected via some terrific bits of tech.

Financial help:
If you want or need to raise money for personal reasons or your favorite charity, the go-to website is GoFundMe®. The best news is that it’s practically free! There’s no fee to start a fundraiser. Since donations are made through credit or debit cards, GoFundMe® automatically deducts 2.9% and 30 cents from each donation to cover processing charges.

“When I received my own diagnosis, I evaluated a half-dozen organizations for where to put my work and support,” said local art photographer Jeff Keefer. “I chose the Michael J. Fox Foundation, because they combine the efforts of everybody to find the cure and close the door based on science.”

Jeff has been a supporter of the organization’s work since he was diagnosed with Parkinson’s in 2005. He has chaired the national Michael J. Fox Foundation and is its current vice chair. In addition, he donates the proceeds from his VIVID Gallery in Sea Pines to the Foundation.

But he wanted to do more—both to raise funds and create awareness.