Hissy Fit - July 2015

Potty Pig: Get Your Oink Together

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by Elizabeth Skenes Millen

It’s called the ladies’ room for a reason. However, most ladies’ rooms I go in don’t look at all like ladies have been in there. They look like a bunch of pigs have come through. I can’t believe the foul condition in which some ladies, and I use that term loosely, choose to leave a public restroom after they have used it. Tissue on the floor, paper towels on the floor, urine on the toilet seat, toilets not flushed and worse things I don’t even want to mention. I don’t understand. Do these “ladies” leave their home bathrooms this disgusting?

This is such an easy problem to fix; it just takes each lady to do her part: 

If you urinate on the seat because you thought it was too gross to sit on in the first place, wipe it off. You’re the one making it too nasty to sit on. 

And for goodness sake, please flush the toilet. How hard is that? Just push the little handle down. If you don’t want to touch it, use a piece of tissue to cover it while you flush and then place the tissue in the toilet before it finishes flushing. Be sure to check if the toilet completely flushed. If it didn’t, please try again. 

If you splash water around the sink, wipe it off. 

If you miss the trash can when tossing your paper towel, lean your butt over and pick it up. 

If you brush your hair at the sink, don’t leave a wad of hair in it. Pick your shedded hair up and throw it away. Nobody wants to touch that—not even housekeeping. 

Come on women, do your part! Appreciate the public toilet. You’d be in a world of hurt if gas stations and retailers decided to close their restrooms they so generously provide for the comfort of the general public. I bet you have stopped at a gas station only to use their restroom. That’s right. You didn’t purchase gas, a drink, not even a pack of gum. You just went in, USED the restroom and left. How dare you leave it filthy! That gas station doesn’t owe you anything. In fact, they just did you a huge favor. Just think of the poor soul that has to come in behind you bunch of nasties and clean up after you. Didn’t your mama teach you anything?

Once again, as in all aspects of life, the Golden Rule applies here, “Leave the bathroom in a condition that you would want left for you.” It’s just that simple. 

Now, I understand we can all find ourselves in a predicament now and then, but it’s no excuse that everyone going in after you has to experience your predicament, too. Believe me when I say some things are better kept to your self. If we all promised to keep that vow, none of us would have to endure the wrath some women have left behind. You know who you are. Now clean your act up and teach your daughters to do the same! Let’s all do our part to make America’s ladies’ rooms clean and sanitary. 

Can I get an Amen?

In a nutshell, if YOU drop tissue on the floor, YOU pick it up. You’re the only one who knows where it’s been. 


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